Sexton Blake and the Hooded Terror (1938)

Now for our 800th review!

Sexton Blake could be considered a bit of a rip-off of Sherlock Holmes being an amateur detective who also lives on Baker Street! However, his stories were very popular in the twentieth century (indeed he was my great-grandfather's favourite detective). In this film, Blake (George Curzon) has to battle the mysterious Black Quorum who are the most powerful and deadliest criminals in the country apparently, though the fact Blake has never heard of them before despite being a famous detective seems quite odd.

The Quorum are led by Larron (Tod Slaughter), who has the appearance of a respectable stamp collector but when he dons his black snake gown and hood he likes to send women to the death chamber. Blake, with the help of his assistant Tinker (Tony Sympson), tracks the Quorum to a house in London. However, he is captured and left to die. Luckily French undercover agent Julie (Greta Gynt) saves the day... The hunt then continues in Paris...

So this is a fast moving romp with numerous cliffhangers and death traps, in some ways it is like a condensed movie serial. Original it isn't but fun it surely is. The ending is certainly unusual especially for a film from this era.

The American President (1995)

A lush US political romantic drama, often rather West Wing in feel at times, it even has Martin Sheen in the White House (though as the chief of staff not the President). The President is Andrew Shepherd (Martin Douglas) who is riding high on the popularity polls. 

However, when lobbyist Sydney Ellen Wade (Annette Bening) goes to the White House to push an environmental bill and meets Shepherd sparks begin to fly.

The President was a widower and once it is known he has a new girlfriend the press go into a frenzy, Shepherd's rival in the next election Senator Rumson (Richard Dreyfuss) begins to make hay. Sydney's character, and that of the President, are put into question and this puts their relationship under strain.

An enjoyable romantic drama with sharp political dialogue and a good cast including Michael J Fox. It is a bit predictable, of course it ends with Shepherd giving a rousing speech.

The Quiller Memorandum (1966)

An enjoyable if flawed 1960s spy thriller. Quiller (George Segal) is an agent sent to Berlin by Pol (Alec Guinness) to hunt a gang of neo-Nazis. However, the Nazis led by Oktober (Max von Sydow) are always one step ahead of him. He needs to find their base and they want to find his. So begins a battle of wits and truth drugs across 1960s Berlin (which is the real star of the show). 

Quiller hooks up with Inge (Senta Berger) who also gets into danger. Of course there is more than meets the eye behind much of what we see...

This is a 1960s spy film in the LeCarre style rather than Bond. Written by Harold Pinter it has the intelligent dialogue, subtlety and lengthy pauses you might expect. It lacks much in the way of action though has plenty of suspense. At times the film is a bit too campy and gets dangerously close to being a spoof. However, the film is worth sticking with.

The film leaves things slightly ambiguous. A great soundtrack by John Barry and a theme song by Matt Munro make this a classic 1960s British spy film.

The World Owes Me a Living (1945)

An interesting premise for a film though the execution unfortunately lets it down. During the Second World War senior officer Paul Collyer (David Farrar) suffers amnesia following a plane crash. Vital plans are kept in his head and his memory needs to be restored as a matter of urgency. His friends, including Moira (Judy Campbell), try and help him remember by going back to the interwar years when Paul was a barnstorming pilot.

Most of the film is told in flashback and details the lives of Paul, Moira and other aviators as they try and make a living giving joyrides. Paul eventually works on a transport glider for the Army. Unfortunately this flashback can often be rather aimless and dull. 

The film isn't without interest and includes plenty of good aerial footage. Not a bad film, it just could have been a lot better. 

Apollo 13 (1995)

One of the greatest adventures based on true events, but when you are depicting events this epic it is surely hard to go wrong. Actually it probably is pretty easy to mess it up but rest assured this does not happen with Apollo 13, this film smashes it.

Jim Lovell (Tom Hanks) is finally heading to the moon having only flown around it on an earlier Apollo mission. There are some last minute snags though due to medical issues and Ken Mattingly (Gary Sinise) has to give up his seat to Jack Swigert (Kevin Bacon). Still nothing else will go wrong now?

Unfortunately something does, an explosion aboard Apollo 13 cripples the mission and puts the lives of the three astronauts (including Bill Paxton) in dire peril. Mission Control headed by Gene Kranz (Ed Harris) and with the help of Mattingly must somehow find a way to bring the crew home, pushing the remaining hardware to the limit and using it in ways it was never intended.

The film is a masterpiece. The technical details and the human story perfectly balanced. The performances are all spot on. An iconic film for iconic events.

The Savage Girl (1932)

After Tarzan comes... the Savage Girl, a wild white girl in the jungle with perfect flowing locks and a very stylish off the shoulder leopard skin dress! Stitch (Harry Myers), an alcoholic millionaire, hires explorer Jim Franklin (Walter Byron) to take him to Africa to get some animals for a zoo he wants to impress his neighbours. Once they reach Africa they hire Adolf Milar (Alec Bernouth) to take them into the bush...

As well as lions and gorillas they soon discover a white girl (Rochelle Hudson) who lives feral in the jungle and is friends with the animals, especially the chimps. When the hunters capture animals she releases them. So they decide to capture her. Afterwards though Franklin gets sweet on her and thinks they should let her go. However, Milar has other ideas. We never find out if the wild girl is wearing pants, but if she is, Milar wants to get into them...

A very silly and ridiculous film with incredibly dated stereotypes but is pretty amusing and charming. It is basically Tarzan as a girl but can be enjoyed in it's own right.

Lola (1970)

A film that could never be made these days. Twinky (Susan George) is an (almost) 16 year old girl (though acts like she is about 12) who loves the trashy romantic novels of Scott Wardman (Charles Bronson). However, her real secret is that she is in a relationship with the author, a much older man. A relationship that usually involves burning his breakfast and lots of sex.

Twinky's family are naturally not that pleased when they find out but Scott and Twinky get married in Scotland and then move to the U.S., where their relationship is put under strain. Twinky's immature behaviour is no doubt quite tiresome to Scott though the fact she wears miniskirts exclusively probably makes up for it and he undoubtedly loves her. Eventually they begin to drift apart as the age gap does finally tell.

A rather strange film and not that brilliant if we are to be honest though light enough to avoid being too offensive. Bronson spends much of the film on autopilot and you can't wait for Twinky to be old enough to start secondary school. 

The film does have an impressive array of British actors in it including Trevor Howard and Honor Blackman though they are mostly wasted with this material. The film is silly and inconsequential and doesn't really go anywhere but worth watching to see Bronson in a very different role than we are used to seeing him usually.

Dilemma (1962)

A highly enjoyable but curious little drama. Music teacher Harry (Peter Halliday) arrives home not long after a scream was heard in his home and his wife Jean (Ingrid Hafner) was seen running out by nosy neighbour Mrs Jones (Edna Burke). Harry has something more important to worry about, there is a dying man in the bathroom! Harry quickly decides he has to get rid of the man, now dead, whom he assumes his wife killed (what a good hubby!) He lifts up the floorboards and buries the corpse in concrete, though amusingly he keeps getting interrupted by the likes of nuns, piano tuners and Mrs Jones.

Jean though is busy too, first of all getting a hand injury stitched up, then getting a flight ticket and then trying to empty her safety deposit box. However, she can't find her key. The police in the form of Inspector Murray (Patrick Jordan) are looking for a known criminal who has been seen in the area. When Harry sees the mugshot he has a shock. Its the bloke now under the floorboards!

A tense little drama though with a degree of farce where Harry is regularly interrupted. The twist in the end when Jean's house of cards collapse is well worth waiting for. The soundtrack is strangely light though considering the content.

The Eagle (1925)

A glorious Rudolph Valentino feature from the golden age of silent film with the usual impressively vast sets and large numbers of extras. Valentino plays Dubrovsky, a lieutenant in the imperial Russian army. After he spurns the advances of the Czarina (Louise Dresser) he is forced to go on the run and become a fugitive.

Dubrovsky returns home and find's his family lands have been seized by the evil Kyrilla (James A Marcus). Dubrovsky becomes a masked bandit to fight Kyrilla and instead falls in love with the evil one's daughter Mascha (Vilma Banky)...

And it is all fast paced swashbuckling fun. Valentino is very much in action mode in this film compared to some of his other films where he is there largely for women to swoon over. A great Valentino film, unfortunately he only had one more in him.

The Teckman Mystery (1954)

A slow-burning but interesting espionage mystery. Philip Chance (John Justin) is tasked to write the biography of a test pilot, Martin Techman. Techman died recently in a plane crash, by coincidence Philip meets the pilot's sister Helen Teckman (Margaret Leighton) on his flight to London. Soon after he begins his task, strange things start to occur. He is offered a lucrative job in Berlin by the somewhat mysterious Mr Rice (Meier Tzeiniker), then Martin's old friend Garvin (George Coulouris) turns up dead in Philip's apartment...

The mystery deepens as Philip meets Martin's wife Ruth (Jane Wenham). The police (Roland Culver) are also very interested in Philip and Techman. Things come to a head when Philip discovers that Martin is alive after all! 

A well-layered mystery with a number of surprises and twists. The film is modest but well formed, Philip's character has the light chippy nature of a Golden Age amateur detective. Indeed this often feels like one of those interwar dramas.

The Silent Partner (1978)

A gripping crime drama. Miles (Elliot Gould) is the unfortunate bank teller at the bank Santa Claus decides to rob. The thief is really Reikle (Christopher Plummer) and he gets away with some cash but Miles sees the opportunity to steal some money himself and place the blame on Reikle. 

Reikle, naturally, is rather taken aback when he reads news that the bank heist was far higher than he actually got. He discovers Miles' address and begins to put pressure on him to hand over the cash. Miles proves to be just a rascal as Reikle though and he fits him up for another crime. That isn't the end of things though as Miles and Reikle begin a game of cat and mouse...

A highly enjoyable crime drama. The coolness of Miles is the highlight of the film as he conceives highly complicated plots to hide the theft of the money, the loss of a safety deposit box and even covering up a murder. His luck in love doesn't go as smoothly especially with Julie (Susanna York) but he gets there in the end.

Out of the Fog (1962)

A neat little crime drama though one which plods along at a leisurely pace. Young blonde girls are being killed on the heath whenever there is a full moon. Detective Superintendent Chadwick (John Arnatt) suspects it could be ex-con George (David Sumner) who has just come out of gaol and is at lodgings nearby, especially as the recent victim was his ex-girlfriend...

WS June Lock (Susan Travers) is sent undercover to befriend George and to eventually act as bait. Will she help prove his innocence or end up the next victim?

A nicely stylish (despite the low budget) early 1960s British film. The film is chiefly about exploring George's dark character, which is just as well because the actual criminal investigation is incredibly pedestrian. George spends most of the film in a bad mood but the more we learn about his life the more we understand just why he has such a poor opinion of his fellow man.

Defence of the Realm (1985)

A highly intelligent political thriller. Reporter Nick Mullen (Gabriel Byrne) investigates an MP (Bill Paterson) who is suspected in being somehow involved with a KGB spy. Mullen's fellow reporter, and old soak, Bayliss (Denholm Elliot) thinks there is a far bigger story. 

After Bayliss' suspicious death, Mullen begins to follow up on what Bayliss was investigating, a mysterious death of a youth and possible involvement in nuclear weapons at a US air base.

Mullen and the MP's assistant Beckman (Greta Scacchi) get involved in a game of cat and mouse with the dark forces behind the state who want to ensure a cover-up, no matter who gets hurt...

The story is very well constructed with excellent performances from the cast. An intricate story of Cold War politics and intrigue. The period view of the workings of the 1980s news room (all typewriters and dicta-phones) is also fascinating.

The Secret Tunnel (1948)

An enjoyable children's adventure. When Roger (Tony Wager) discovers that his Dad's Rembrandt has been stolen from the supposedly secure vault at his mansion, he begins to investigate with John (Ivor Bowyer) the butler's son. They find a secret tunnel that leads from the vault and suspicion falls on the cook Mrs Matthews (Thelma Rea) and the antique seller Mr Harvey (Frank Henderson)...

Then a gang is let into the house by Mrs Matthews to empty out the rest of the vault. The two boys are captured but manage to escape and then help the police find the gang's hide out...

A straight forward adventure with plenty for viewers (of all ages) to enjoy. The story is fairly cliched but there is nothing wrong with good old fashioned fun.

House on Haunted Hill (1959)

A hilariously over-the-top and camp horror film. Mr Loren (Vincent Price) invites a mixture of people to a party at a notorious haunted house with his wife Annabelle (Carol Ohmart). Loren challenges the guests to stay a night in return for money. Almost immediately very strange things start to happen, a chandelier nearly falls on Nora (Caroline Craig), unfortunately she survives and is able to scream her tonsils off for most of the rest of the film. Dr Trent (Alan Marshal) says it is just hysteria and not ghosts which Nora keeps seeing...

Then Annabelle is found hung, but was it suicide or murder? Loren delights in showing his guests a pit of acid which is in the cellar. It isn't much of a party, not really swinging... well apart from Annabelle. Though she later appears outside Nora's window causing some more screams. There is something more going on than bumps in the night...

Once we get the twist then the film transforms from a rather silly though entertaining camp horror to something a bit more clever. 

Billy the Kid and the Green Baize Vampire (1987)

A vampire snooker musical, yes you read that right. A very strange film it is too (as you probably would expect). It is based on the real-life snooker rivalry between the old guard (and Dracula-like) Ray Reardon and young buck Jimmy White.

T.O. (Bruce Payne) is the manager of young snooker player Billy the Kid (Phil Daniels), he has a gambling problem and big debts owed to The Wednesday Man (Don Henderson). The Wednesday Man manipulates T.O. into agreeing to arrange a showdown snooker match between Billy and champion Maxwell Randall (Alun Armstrong) who has something of the night about him...

Unknown to Billy the loser of the match will also have to give up their career. Randall isn't quite the washed up has-been Billy is let to think he is.

The story line contains a number of songs, of various quality. The story is fairly light and frequently bizarre. A surreal film, maybe a little too weird to be "good" but definitely memorable and highly enjoyable.

Dead End (1937)

Life on the East Side slum in Noo Yoick where the lives of the poor are overlooked by the rich. The film mostly centres around the adventures of a group of urchins, the Dead End Kids (who make their movie debut here). Around them a series of dramas. An unemployed architect, Dave (Joel McCrea) is torn between two girls. Drina (Sylvia Sidney) is in a labour dispute and is as hard-up as he is, Kay (Wendy Bray) is the mistress of a rich guy and she doesn't fancy being poor again.

Meanwhile gangster Babyface Martin (Humphrey Bogart) has returned to his old neighbourhood. He wants to find his mother and his old squeeze but isn't happy when he finds them...

The film is based on a Broadway show and often plays like one with fast moving action which swiftly moves from character to character on one big set. Life is rough and hard, but there is humour to be found in even the darkest of times. Great film, and great accents.

Go Ask Alice (1973)

A powerful anti-drug film, based on a supposedly real (though probably fictional) diary. Alice (Jamie Smith-Jackson) is a teenage girl who is having a difficult time at school being in the uncool crowd. But then the cool kids take her under their wing and she starts loading up on various drugs. She even starts dealing to kids. Things come to a head when she runs off with a friend and ends up whoring her way across America looking for her next score. She finally confides in a priest (Andy Griffith) and tries to turn clean.

However, now she is regarded as an enemy by the in-crowd who try to get her back on the drugs. She has a psychotic session where she self-harms. Can she come back from the brink and back to her parents (William Shatner and Julie Adams)?

A film of it's time, and that time does include a very good soundtrack. The acting is often a bit hesitant and awkward but it does give everything an authentic feel. 

The Day of the Triffids (1962)

A decent adaptation of the classic sci-fi novel by John Wyndham. The Earth is bathed in light from the heavens from a meteorite shower, everyone is watching the show except for poor sailor Bill (Howard Keel) who suffered an eye injury and is all bandaged up. However, the next day nearly everyone on Earth is completely blind and Bill wakes up to find the world in chaos (once he removed his bandages himself).

London is in chaos, including a train crashing into the buffers at the station. Here Bill finds another person who can see, schoolgirl Susan (Janina Faye). Together they cross to France to hopefully find help. They link up with the sighted Christine (Nicole Maurey) and continue onto Spain where the Royal Navy is looking to pick up survivors. If the situation wasn't serious enough there are also the triffids, bizarre plants from outer space that can move and have the taste for human flesh. They roam the countryside in huge packs looking for human survivors. However, they have a weakness for ice cream van music...

Meanwhile, on a lighthouse bickering couple Tom (Kieron Moore) and Karen (Janette Scott) are also besieged by the triffids. They finally stumble on a way to kill the plants (though it is that simple you wonder why no one else had thought of it already...)

A fast moving film full of sci-fi horror. The triffids look ridiculous though are scary. Some of the scenes of the film are harrowing, such as the train crash with the blind survivors desperately scrambling around. The plot doesn't make a huge amount of sense but it is an enjoyable sci-fi romp.

The Woman Eater (1958)

A strange film, a typical 1950s monster film though with a rather slow restrained manner despite the fact it includes a tree which feeds on women. 

Evil scientist Dr Moran (George Coulouris) discovers a tree in the Amazon which feeds on human flesh (of the female kind) and in return provides a serum which can bring the dead back to life (though presumably not half-eaten women).

He brings the tree back to England, along with native Tanga (Jimmy Vaughn) who regards the tree as his god, and feeds it a steady diet of women from the streets of Soho so he can obtain the serum. Sally (Vera Day) gets a job with Moran but soon wants to leave. However, Moran has fallen in love with her and decides to share his secrets with her...

A creepy film with a ridiculously looking tree (though thankfully we don't get to see it much). So many questions of course, why does the tree only want to eat beautiful women? Why did the tribe allow Moran to take their deity away? Naturally nothing really makes sense. Good campy fun.

Women in Blue (1943)

A fascinating if somewhat dated short film showing the training of new recruits to the US Navy Women's Auxiliary Volunteer Emergency Service (WAVES). The narrator (Hugh James) explains that the recruits learn how to march and learn important information such as how the Navy is run (unfortunately the narrator was able to resist the temptation to quip "badly"). Then they can take over base duties from men who can be sent into combat (to their universal delight of course).

Dangerous Paradise (1930)

A somewhat clunky early talkie. Heyst (Richard Arlen) is a hermit (though rather well dressed) who has his own island in the South Seas. On a visit to Surabaya he encounters Alma (Nancy Carroll) in a bar who is a rather harassed young musician. The bar owner Schonberg (Warner Oland) makes no secret of his aim to get into Alma's pants so the young girl stows away on Heyst's boat...

Unfortunately some bad men also soon arrive on Heyst's island. They are convinced there is treasure to be found despite Heyst's protestations. Can Heyst and Alma survive this incursion and (obviously) fall in love?

A reasonable little (and short) story though suffers from sound problems at times with the dialogue being unclear or drowned out. The film is interesting to see the future Charlie Chan as a sexual sleazeball.

The Spy Who Came in from the Cold (1965)

An excellent and bleak spy drama, and a very good John Le Carre adaptation. Leamas (Richard Burton) is a burned out spy running British intelligence operations in Berlin. Back in London Leamas is given a new mission to pose as a defector with the aim of discrediting Mundt (Peter van Eyck) of East German intelligence. 

Leamas builds a new identity of a washed out drunk, though enters a relationship with naive young communist Nan (Claire Bloom). Once he defects Leamas is interrogated by Mundt and his rival Fiedler (Oscar Werner). Leamas soon realises that he is just a pawn in a bigger game, and to his horror Nan is another pawn...

A deep and rich spy drama. The inhumanity, grubbiness and cruelty of the Cold War spy game has seldom been better portrayed. Burton's and Werner's performances are truly excellent. One of the best L'Carre adaptations, maybe one of the best spy movies of all.

Rock City: London 1964-73 (1973)

The story of the British rock scene from the early 1960s to the 1970s, well a kind of documentary. It is mostly a series of (mostly) great live performances - and some early music videos - interspersed with interviews.

If we are to be honest a lot of the interviews are not very illuminating (though Pete Townsend's anti-drug stance is interesting, as it comes alongside footage of Brian Jones' troubles). It doesn't really matter as the songs from the likes of the Rolling Stones, Cream, Crazy World of Arthur Brown, Joe Cocker and Jimi Hendrix (and many more) are incredible. 

It is a bit of a hippy-fest, a film of it's time, but what a time.

Devil's Bait (1959)

A neat little B-movie. Frisby the baker (Geoffrey Keen) and his wife (Jane Hylton) have a problem with rats at their bakery. They employ an alcoholic rat catcher Mr Love (Dermot Kelly) to get rid of them. Mr Love uses some cyanide for his baits and ends up using a loaf tin to mix it. Then he goes off to have a drink... and ends up dying down a railway embankment. Unfortunately Mrs Frisby has used the poisoned tin to make a loaf...

Police Sergeant Malcolm (Gordon Jackson) begins a race against time to find out who bought the loaf and stop them from eating the cyanide laced bread...

A fast moving film with plenty of suspense. A limited film but makes the most of what it has.

Hillbillys in a Haunted House (1967)

An incredibly weird film, despite the title it isn't really a horror film. It is more like a goofy spy comedy (though the humour is mostly unintentional) film with added country music. 

Three country singers (Ferlin Husky, Joi Lansing and Don Bowman) are on their way to Nashville, to avoid a storm they stay in what appears to be an abandoned house. However, the house is really the secret base of a bunch of spies (John Carradine, Lon Chaney Jr, Basil Rathbone and Linda Ho) plus an unconvincing man in a gorilla costume. They have a basement torture dungeon and are after a secret formula at a nearby missile plant...

The spies try and scare the country singers away with a collection of rather lame "ghosts". Though there is a real ghost in the house which stirs the pot a bit...

A very strange film, at times so unbearable but at the same time so watchable. Country tunes (some of which are pretty good) are thrown in seemingly at random and with little real justification with respect to the plot. Don't expect many scares, but do expect some real oddness and awkwardness. 

This was Basil Rathbone's penultimate film (and his last in English) and he co-starred with Merle Haggard. A terrible film and great at the same time.

The Phantom Empire (Serial) (1935)

Now as we know, 1930s movie serials are often quite odd but this one must be one of the strangest of all. It is a kind of mixture of cowboy musical and the usual mad science adventure. The singing cowboy Gene Autry discovers his ranch is above part of the lost continent of Mu and a science city ruled by Queen Tika (Dorothy Christie) is right under his feet!

However, Tika has trouble. Lord Argo (Wheeler Oakman) has led a rebellion to overthrow Tika and threaten the world above. Autry rides to the rescue, assisted by a group of young cowpersons in metal helmets led by Frankie Darro and Betsy King Ross. Can Autry save the world and also his radio show? That is a major plot point you see, the bad guys try to stop him from performing his radio show so he won't be able to keep up the payments on his ranch. There is a fortune in radium under there, and Mu's disintegration ray.

So this has the usual cliff hangers, ingenious (and doomed to fail) traps for our heroes, sparkling scientific apparatus and recycled costumes. Yes as usual the denizens of these lost cities full of advanced science (including sparkling electricity, clunky robots and television) fight with swords and helmets... The addition of cowboys and trick riding makes this serial quite frankly amazing and completely bonkers.

The Big Bird Cage (1972)

A shameless piece of rather grubby sexploitation set in a women's prison in the Philippines jungle. Terry (Anitra Ford) is a rather big headed young women who gets mixed up in a robbery by wanna-be revolutionaries Blossom (Pam Grier) and Django (Sid Haig). Terry gets sent into the jungle to a brutal prison governed by the gloriously over-acting Zappa (Andres Centenera)...

Terry's bravado and spirit is slowly crushed as she realises her women's wiles for once won't get her out of this one. But Blossom and Django have a plan to break the prisoners out of jail. They both infiltrate the prison (Blossom as a prisoner, Django as a ridiculously camp guard) to prepare for revolution...

It isn't a subtle film, it includes torture, rape, murder and lots of female nudity of course. High art it ain't, trash it certainly is and when treated in the right way it will deliver.

Dressed to Kill (1946)

Sherlock Holmes (Basil Rathbone) and Dr Watson (Nigel Bruce) investigate a case of little wooden musical boxes which hold a clue to the location of a property so hot a gang are prepared to kill for them. The boxes were made by a convict who stole the plates to print £5 notes in the Bank of England, the boxes containing the coded location of the plates. Unfortunately for the gang led by Hilda Courtney (Patrica Morrison) the boxes are sold before they can get their hands on them...

Holmes and Watson get involved in the case after one of Watson's friends (Edmund Breon) is killed over the musical box he bought. Holmes enters a battle of wits with Courtney who in many ways proves to be his equal...

An enjoyable little Sherlock Holmes mystery with the usual clever deductions and no small amount of suspense and tension. This was the last in the long series of Sherlock Holmes films made by Rathbone and Bruce and the series certainly went out on a high.

Alley Cat (1984)

A rather grim and dingy and violent vigilante film, in a way it is Death Wish but with a female lead. Billie (Karin Mani) catches some imitation hardcases trying to steal her tyres. After he beats them up with her karate skills they go running off to their boss Scarface (Michael Wayne) who kills Billie's grandmother. Billie herself ends up in jail after she stops a rape due to a corrupt cop...

Billie begins a one-woman mission to bring Scarface and his gang to justice, one way or another. The film has a lot of averagely choreographed fights, unfortunately most take place in the dark. There is also a lot of female nudity as well, including in prison...

It is a pretty run-of-the-mill low budget 1980s video nasty. Violent and grubby, it is very trashy. The best thing (by far) about the film is Karin, who does look pretty decent when she is fighting (and in general). 

Carnival of Souls (1962)

A chilling, excellent if rather odd horror film. Mary (Candice Hilligoss) is involved in a motor accident where a car she is in with two other girls crashes into a river. Somehow Mary manages to get out of the car but wants to get away from town as soon as she can, she moves to Utah to be a church organist. Living in a house owned by Mrs Thomas (Frances Feist) with her rolling eyes and a rather creepy fellow boarder John (Sidney Berger) who drinks booze for breakfast and wants to get into her underwear so overtly its a wonder he doesn't have "sex pest" written on his forehead.

Mary is obsessed by a shuttered carnival venue, and also strange things happen to her. From time to time she suffers hearing loss and no one can hear / see her. She also keeps seeing a horrific white zombie face everywhere. As times goes, especially after the vicar (Art Ellison) fires her for playing profane organ music in church, on she realises she is not supposed to be in this world...

Although a slow moving film at times, it isn't without plenty of thrills and chills and makes the most of a tiny budget. It isn't a horror film for gore and blood, the scares come from the surreal feel of most of the scenes. Mary knows something isn't right with her world and this is very effectively portrayed. Very atmospheric (in a natural sense) with few missteps. A very good horror film and certainly one that needs to be better known.

The Arsenal Stadium Mystery (1939)

A player (Anthony Bushell) collapses during a match at Highbury, is he injured? Is he dead? Was he murdered? Indeed he was and the rather eccentric detective Anthony Slade (Leslie Banks) is bought in, once he is dragged away from a show he is producing (which includes policemen in tutus) and has chosen the correct hat.

So this is a rather strange film but is a decent crime drama. Slade discovers that poison applied to a ring sent to the deceased was the means. The question is who sent the ring and wanted the man dead. Slade begins to look into the pasts of the other team mates...

A rather light film (despite the fact it includes two murders) which is mostly down to the odd but entertaining performance of Banks. Some real Arsenal stars of the day appear as themselves, the manager George Allison actually doing quite well in his role.

The best part of this film is the fascinating look at top level football in the late 1930s, rather different to today!

Corridor of Mirrors (1948)

What exactly is going on amid this glorious array of Gothic atmosphere and opulence? Mifanwy (Eric Portman) is returning to London to see her lover, and in flash back she remembers how she met the rather odd Paul (Edana Romney). Paul was a throw-back in terms of dress who lived in a mansion surrounded by exotic ornaments and costumes. He was obsessed with dressing her up as his Renaissance fantasy...

When Mifanwy began to realise Paul was trying to control her, he unveils a painting which looks exactly like her. He tells her that he thinks they were lovers in previous lives four hundred years before in Renaissance Italy. However, his house and life has other mysteries. Who exactly is the strange woman Veronica (Barbara Mullen), a housekeeper or something more?

A lush drama with events which come to a dramatic head at the end of a Venetian ball when another girl, Caroline (Joan Maude) is found dead in his home. As the film progresses the strange events become clearer... to an extent. However, there is some ambiguity still and that adds to the joy of this masterpiece, True mystery and fantasy should always leave one slightly confused. Look out for Christopher Lee in his film debut, though blink and you'll probably miss it!

Dolemite (1975)

A blaxploitation classic, though at times verges on self-parody even for this ridiculous genre! Dolemite (Rudy Ray Moore) is a pimp released from gaol on a secret mission to stop his rival and the corrupt cops who put him in there in the first place. His method of carrying out the mission is basically moving from set-piece to set-piece (usually a brothel) and getting into various fights amid a deluge of bad language...

It is a compelling film for sure as Dolemite hunts down his rival Willie Green (D'Urville Martin) and discovers who is the big name pulling the strings behind the scene. Dolemite is assisted by his girl Chi, his madame Queen Bee (Lady Reed) and an uncover FBI agent (Jerry Reed). The film is pretty violent (though much of it rather inept) and full of wacky characters including the crazed Mayor (Hy Pyke) and a horny gun-running Reverend (Wesley Gale).

The film is a comedy and should be treated and enjoyed as such. The plot is basic, the acting almost universally poor, the action fumbling and clumsy, the film making rough and cheap. The film is brilliant of course.

Dead Man's Evidence (1962)

A low wattage but interesting spy drama. When a frogman washes up on a beach in Ireland, Agent Baxter (Conrad Phillips) is sent to see if the dead man is missing agent Fallon (Ryck Rydon). There is a double agent in the Department and the suspicion is Fallon could be that man. Baxter arrives in Ireland (which is mostly free of dodgy accents and stereotypes thankfully) and meets Linda (Jane Griffiths) who found the dead man...

Baxter wants a ring that was found on the frogman but was missing when the body was taken to the morgue. Gay (Veronica Hurst) was also present when the body was found and seems to know a mysterious bearded man who indeed turns out to be Fallon. However, this film has a tremendous twist...

So a great twist, the problem is the film is a bit of a slog to get there. There isn't a great deal of action apart from a few scuffles. As the film progresses the behaviour of the principals (especially Baxter and Linda) becomes stranger and stranger, which ultimately makes sense.

The Last Shark (1981)

A pretty shameless Jaws rip-off. The annual wind-surfing regatta is due, which the Mayor (Joshua Sinclair) is planning to use for his re-election campaign. But... a huge angry Great White Shark is also moving in on the area. The rather unusual pairing of horror writer Peter Benton (James Franciscus) and grizzled sea dog Ron Hamer (Vic Morrow) try to get the regatta called off but the Mayor has put a whole year has work has gone into it apparently (must have a small staff). The regatta goes ahead... and the shark gatecrashes.

The hunt is therefore on for the shark. Unfortunately for the seaside town the various attempts by Peter and Ron, a bunch of kids and the Mayor in a helicopter end in failure/death basically because they seem to involve dangling lumps of meat in the water and then not knowing what to do next...

It is nonsense and rather silly. The shark easily outwits the dumb humans. The special effects arn't too bad though cheaper than... the other shark movie. It isn't that bad a movie, just a bit unoriginal. The way Peter finally finds to defeat the shark is quite inventive though...

How to Undress in Front of Your Husband (1937)

A strange little piece of sexploitation. Women have known how to dress for ages, the narrator (Albert van Antwerp) tells us but many women can't undress. While a peeping tom (Hal Richardson) looks on with his camera, we see two different women as they undress and get ready for bed. 

Elaine Barrie is all grace. With effortless ease she undresses, a masterpiece in lingerie. Trixie Fraganza is the complete opposite. More a dump truck than a graceful swan. That is it basically. There is a little bit of mild nudity, some dodgy humour and even dodgier stereotypes. Very odd and very much of it's time!

Top of the Heap (1972)

An interesting, if disjointed, tale of racism, patriotism and mental health. George (Christopher St John) is a tough black cop who is looked over for promotion. He also has trouble at home with his nagging wife (Florence St Peter) and teenage daughter, his thoughts keep slipping into an odd fantasy where he is an astronaut on the Moon...

The film is quite unusual, not so much a crime drama, more a commentary of the times. George is disturbed by the disrespect for the US flag he sees in every corner and the obstacles put in his way by The Man. In truth the film is a little awkward, the good ideas lost in a rather erratic execution and the surreal astronaut daydreams which sometimes drag. 

The film is an interesting piece of social and political commentary but not that interesting a watch.

Fighting Coast Guard (1951)

A decent if fairly unoriginal war movie. Bill Rourk (Forrest Tucker) is a foreman in a shipyard, he is chasing Admiral's daughter Louise (Ella Raines), who is also the beau of US Coast Guard Commander Ian McFarland (Brian Donlevy). After Pearl Harbor the world suddenly changes, and Bill is tricked into joining the Coast Guard at the academy under Ian's command...

Bill is still courting Louise, though it gets him into trouble. He assumes Ian has it in for him and has ruined his chances. He ends up in combat in a ship under Ian's command. Will he survive the war and get back to see Louise?

This film has all the usual war movie themes, the only really novel part is that it involves the Coast Guard. The film is a good watch though with plenty of stock footage during the battle scenes. The love triangle is probably the weakest part of the film but it is OK.

Bells (1982)

There are many ways to kill people especially in Hollywood movies, in this one (which is also known as Murder by Phone) the method of murder is to send sonic death signals and electric shocks down the line. When one of his former students is killed in this grisly manner, Nat Bridger (Richard Chamberlain) heads into the city to try and find out what exactly is going on. A man with a grudge (Robin Gammell) is carrying out these killings, the telephone company isn't really helping much by using it's huge corporate power and influence to bury the problem.

Nat, with the help of Ridley (Sara Botsford) and the police (Gary Reineke), begins to unravel the plot and the cover-up. The film is full of tension and suspense especially in the final act as Nat challenges the killer to call him so his location can be traced. 

A fantastic film but one which will probably leave you with an irrational fear of the telephone. Luckily nobody speaks on the phone anymore and nobody has worked out a way to kill people using SMS or Twitter... yet.

Bloodline (1979)

Quite possibly the worst film ever made, a hideous film in so many ways, and of course very watchable because of that. 

After the owner of a pharmaceutical company is killed (he is climbing a mountain dressed in what looks like a Spiderman outfit and his rope is cut), his daughter and heir Elizabeth (Audrey Hepburn) is under pressure to sell the company by the board members (a host of stars including James Mason and Omar Sharif) who all have their own money troubles.

Elizabeth decides to not sell and she is now in danger. She manages to survive a number of botched murder attempts. Meanwhile, a detective (Gert Frobe) investigates the death of Elizabeth's father - mostly by talking to a computer (which speaks back of course with a wonderfully retro synthesised voice). There is also a strange snuff-video subplot which doesn't seem to have much of anything to do with the main plot...

The film is a car crash (and also includes a number of car crashes). It is incredibly trashy and shoddy. A perfect adaptation of a Sidney Sheldon book then. The dialogue is banal, the editing rough, the plot makes little sense. Quite why such a great cast wanted to be involved with this is the true mystery. Like the board members in the film they obviously needed the money. 

The Barber Shop (1933)

Another W.C. Fields comedy short as he drawls his way through being a rather inept barber. To be honest he doesn't do anything right, even throwing a baseball seems to end up in mayhem. Barber O'Hair is the character's name (of course) and has a pretty sad life, his wife is a vegetarian and he never gets any meat. He does enjoy sitting outside of his shop all day and chasing away dogs. Not the funniest W.C. Fields short but a decent and charming performance as always.

The Big Noise (1944)

One of Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy's later films, the jokes are by now a bit too obvious but still usually hilarious. Professor Hartley (Arthur Space) is an eccentric inventor who is always coming up with madcap schemes. His latest invention is a new explosive which he is told he must protect (thanks to a bit of mischief). He calls a detective agency but only the janitors are available, but the prospect of good living and cash leads the janitors (Laurel and Hardy) to pretend to be detectives...

Meanwhile a gang is planning to rob Hartley of jewels but when members of the gang hear about the explosive they want to steal the explosive instead and sell it to the enemy (insert a bit of wartime propaganda here). Laurel and Hardy are set off with a fake bomb hidden in an accordion to lead the thieves away, but of course they have the real bomb...

A very funny film even if the jokes are often so obvious you can spot them coming a mile off. There isn't much plot, more a framework for a series of comedy set-pieces. The visual gags are very good though. Not the best Laurel and Hardy film by any means but still has plenty of the duo's magic to make the film very worth watching.

High Treason (1929)

High Treason is one of the earliest British "talkies" and also an early science fiction film, being set in the "near future" of 1940. However, despite being only set eleven years into the future the world is a very different place (though quite familiar to us today). 

Two power blocs jockey for position in an uneasy peace. Arms manufacturers don't like peace of course as its bad for business so they engineer a war between the Atlantic States and Europe by bombing the Channel Tunnel. Ironically, big business manipulating two states into a war actually happened in South America a few years later in the 1930s...

Dr Seymour (Humberston Wright) leads a peace league which is opposed to the seemingly inevitable war. Injured in an explosion he calls upon his daughter Evelyn (Benita Hume) to stop the bombers... one complication is that the bombers are commanded by her ex Deane (Jameson Thomas)...

As you can imagine the world in 1940 is an Art Deco masterpiece with aeroplanes and airships flying over skyscraper filled cities, video calling and fencing being the interval act at a dance. While the film looks a treat, the story is a bit hokum and the peace message is hammered on rather too thickly. 

War is averted by a rather neat twist (though you can see it coming). Peace in our times, well for a few years anyway.