Contraband (1940)

An excellent little wartime spy drama. Andersen (Conrad Veidt) is the captain of a neutral Danish freighter which is impounded by the Royal Navy to check it's cargo. Two of his passengers, Mrs Sorensen (Valerie Hobson) and Mr Pidgeon (Esmond Knight), jump ship and head for London. Andersen goes in pursuit, he catches up with Sorensen and soon finds he is involved in a cat and mouse fight between British and German agents.

Andersen and Sorensen end up the prisoners of the Germans in a basement lair. Andersen manages to escape and enlists the help of some of his countrymen to save the day and more importantly Mrs Sorensen...

An exciting film full of derring-do that makes the most of a modest budget. Filmed when it was, just as the war was starting, the propaganda is dialled back and the Germans are mostly portrayed as doing their duty as opposed to just being evil. The growing relationship between Andersen and Sorensen is well portrayed and very believable.

Runaway (1984)

A rather strange, sometimes cheesy, but definitely fun future cop film. It is the near future (and looks like 1985) and robots are everywhere, doing everything from the cooking to construction. However, sometimes they go wrong and that is where the specialist police team led by Ramsey (Tom Selleck) comes in. Along with his new partner Thompson (Cynthia Rhodes) they chase and disable a runaway agricultural robot. But soon things become much more serious when they are called to the case of a robot which has killed people...

They discover the robot has been modified by an unauthorised microchip and under the control of someone else. That someone else is Luther (Gene Simmons), a rather over the top hoodlum and electronics expert, who wants to make these killer chips to terrorists and the mob. Ramsey seeks to stop Luther though he always seems one step ahead, plus he has a gun which fires heat seeking bullets...

A glorious mess of a film, completely ridiculous in many ways but always entertaining and with some interesting ideas about how technology would develop in the future (and they got a lot of things spot on). Tom Selleck seems a bit out of place in this film but that makes it all the more fun and to be fair he does a good job. Gene Simmons chews the scenery but it completely suits the film. Also look out for Kirstie Alley.

Once in a New Moon (1935)

What would happen if a sleepy English seaside village was sucked into space and became a new sphere orbiting the Earth? I'm sure it is a question everyone has asked at some stage, well here is the answer. 

Shrimpton-on-Sea is a typical English village with a well meaning but pompous Lord (Morton Selten) and the populace veering between fawning obedience and simmering revolutionary resentment. A passing dead star pulls the village off into space and it becomes Shrimpton-in-Space!

The postmaster and keen scientist Drake (Eliot Makeham) knows what is going on but the Lord and his committee of yes-men laugh at him... until he takes a boat to "circumnavigate" the globe in a few hours! They indeed are now on their own and cut off from the rest of the world. With every resource in limited supply the Lord orders a system of rationing but some voices start to call for the Lord's estate, and it's riches, be plundered for the good of all. Conflict sparks between the two captions...

A science-fiction tale but mostly this is an often funny satire on Interwar Britain with it's slightly shakey but still intact class system and the dark shadow of socialism threatening to cut the Lord off from his sherry. Drake's daughter Stella (Rene Ray) and the Lord's son Bryan-Grant (Derrick de Marney) provide the love interest, and of course another aspect of the class-divide which is explored in this film. Mary Hinton is perfect as the snooty Lady of the manor.

The Battle of the Century (1927)

A Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy comedy short most famous for it's custard pie fight! Before that though Stan Laurel is the world's most unlikely prize fighter and inevitably gets beaten. Oliver Hardy takes out an insurance policy on Stan (sold by the unscrupulous Eugene Pallette) and then tries to engineer an accident using a banana peel. Things don't go to plan of course and after the banana peel causes a custard pie salesman (Charlie Hall) to slip and fall all Hell breaks out in the resultant custard pie fight! 

The custard pie fight goes on for a long time, maybe too long but fulfils all the slapstick requirements of a comedy short of the period. The pie fight was said to have used at least 3, 000 custard pies (and maybe many more according to some sources!) This was one of the earliest official Laurel and Hardy films and they had yet to master their characters but the film is still good fun, though a bit disjointed due to missing parts of the film.

Assault on Precinct 13 (1976)

Gang violence is spiralling out of control in LA, after the police gun down members of one gang, it's leaders make a blood vow for revenge. Meanwhile Lt. Bishop (Austin Stoker) has gained a new assignment, look after Precinct 13's old police building on the last night before moving to a new building. His new "command" consists of a sergeant (Henry Brandon) and two secretaries (Laurie Zimmer and Nancy Kytes). But it will be a quiet night won't it?

Not quite, first of all a prison bus containing Napoleon (Darwin Joston) and Wells (Tony Burton) turns up requiring use of the cells. Then Lawson (Martin West) staggers in, on the run from the gang. He killed one of their members in revenge after they gunned down his daughter (Kim Richards) and now the gang are out for revenge themselves at any price. Bishop's police station is under siege but he lacks manpower. Can he trust those guys in the cells?

The siege is a thrilling battle for survival, the gang members are portrayed as a faceless and relentless army. The film is basically an old school Western or war film set in the modern city with a wave of "savages" mowed down by a small group of heroes. The film is violent and frequently dark, the senseless gunning down of a little girl buying ice cream for example. The gang's motivations are never explored, they just want to kill and no reason is given but that is one of the things which makes the film all the more scary.

Doctor in Distress (1963)

A typical early 1960s British comedy romp which were churned out by the dozen and one of the long-running Doctor series. The theme of the film is love with both Dr Sparrow (Dirk Bogarde) and Sir Lancelot Spratt (James Robertson Justice) both falling in love. Sir Lancelot needs the help from Dr Sparrow though in these matters of the heart.

As for Dr Sparrow he has fallen for one of his patients, an aspiring actress Delia (Samantha Eggar). Things take a turn for the worse when she heads off to Rome after getting a part in a film. Sir Lancelot is in love, for the first time, with Iris (Barbara Murray) the physiotherapist. To try and woo her he tries to lose his belly with the help of a corset and even enrols in a health farm!

Every situation of course ends up in predictable chaos and mild nonsense. Most of the jokes and situations are rather familiar but enjoyable enough. The likes of Leo McKern, Richard Briers and Ronnie Barker appear in minor roles, and spotting them is great - maybe the best part of the film. Its not earth shattering but plenty of fun.

Putting Pants on Philip (1927)

Although they had appeared together in a number of films beforehand (the first being 1921's The Lucky Dog), this was the first official Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy film. Ollie is at the docks waiting for his nephew (Stan) from Scotland. To his surprise, shock and the hilarity of everyone in town his nephew is wearing a kilt. That basically is the premise of the film, everyone finds a man in a kilt so funny, obviously they must be hard up for entertainment.

Fed up by all the attention, Ollie tries to get Stan some trousers. Stan isn't very keen on wearing them though, he is very keen on a flapper (Dorothy Coburn) though she doesn't exactly share the attraction.

So, a bit of a one joke film, which is fine if the joke is good but this one is a bit average. The film is watchable and quite funny but mostly of interest for historic value. The Laurel and Hardy double act was still a work in progress, soon it would conquer the world of comedy but not quite in this film.