Are You Being Served? (1977)

The typical plot of the feature length film version of a British sitcom (as were popular in the 1970s) was to send the cast off on holiday. As is the case here where the Grace Brothers department store is closed for refurbishment. Mr Humphries (John Inman), Mrs Slocombe (Molly Sugden), Captain Peacock (Frank Thornton) and the rest end up on the Costa...

And many stereotypes abound. The hotel, managed by Don Carlos (Andrew Sachs), is unfinished and they have to stay in tents. The toilet is a shed. That doesn't really matter though as the local hardman (Glyn Houston) is preparing to launch an uprising...

It is very crude, the innuendo and double entendres a little rawer than the TV version. The plot is pretty nonexistent being just a prop for a series of comedy set pieces but it is very very funny. It probably helps if you are familiar with the TV series and the characters as there is little effort to set them up for new viewers. Its not high art but it is great.

Q Planes (1939)

A frenetic, breezy and brilliant spy adventure. A number of experimental planes have gone missing across the world and the latest is British. Intelligence agent Major Charles (Ralph Richardson) thinks it isn't a coincidence and indeed it isn't. A mysterious (and unnamed though probably German) foreign power is using a secret "death ray" to knock planes out of the sky and salvage them when they end up in the drink...

At the aircraft factory top pilot Tony (Laurence Olivier) is also suspicious as is the new tea girl Kay (Valerie Hobson) though her suspicion is more due to the fact she is an undercover reporter looking for a story. While the hunt for the truth continues Tony heads off on his own ill-fated test flight...

Light in tone, despite a final act which includes multiple machine gun deaths, this is a highly enjoyable espionage romp. It is quirky, it is nonsense but it is also fantastic. It definitely doesn't take itself seriously, it might dance a bit close to the line of parody though at times.

Biohazard: the Alien Force (1994)

A bizarre mutant has been created by mad scientists, naturally the creature goes on a murdering rampage (why can't they ever create nice monsters?) This is a rather strange and pretty gory low-budget science-fiction horror. Quite why Brady (Christopher Mitchum) wants to create a creature so out of control is never made quite clear.

Once the creature has escaped it needs to feed on the people (former and current employees) who donated DNA to it's creation. Sooner or later it also wants to mate with a lucky female donor. Security chief Quint (Tom Ferguson) is going around trying to re-capture the monster and kill the donors - he seems to spend a lot more effort doing the latter but its good to see a man enjoy his work.

Meanwhile former employee Mike (Steve Zurk) is helping reporter Nicki (Susan Fronsoe) investigate the whole mess. To provide a little bit of extra peril some donors also had their DNA altered, though the effects seem to be held off by drinking a lot of vodka...

The plot is fairly basic and seems to have been largely made up as they went along, there were many inconsistencies and bits that made little sense. The film is rather cheesy and gory but it is fun. The acting in this straight-to-video epic is as you expect but perfect for this kind of film. The monster looks pretty good considering. It is awful and great, like all the best cult films.

The Crooked Circle (1932)

Confusing but too frenetic to make the lack of sense matter too much. A secret crime / occult society wish the leader of a rival amateur crime fighting society Colonel Walters (Berton Churchill) dead. Brand (Ben Lyon) meanwhile is leaving the society to be replaced by the somewhat mysterious Yoganda (C. Henry Gordon)...

Walters receives the death card from the criminals, the Crooked Circle. They promise he will die this night, naturally he decides to spend the night in a mysterious dark house in the country with trap doors and secret rooms behind every mantelpiece. Brand heads to the house too after he finds his fiance Thelma (Irene Purcell) is on her way there. But why and how is she mixed up in this?

No one knows, even the audience really, as most of the film is a seemingly random sequence of escapades in the house punctuated by the yelps of Nora the housekeeper (Zasu Pitts) and a bumbling cop (James Gleason)...

It is nonsense, it is confusing but it is also highly entertaining with a good dose of comedy. Maybe a little too much comedy at times but if the film is treated as a rather over the top dark house style comedy-crime romp then you will get the most out of it. There are many surprises and mysteries and the film is perfect to play "1930s mystery film bingo" to.

Derby Day (1923)

The Rascals or Our Gang series were short comedy films showing the antics of a group of kids including Joe Cobb, Jackie Cordon and Mickey Daniels. In this film they are trying to sell lemonade and hot dogs at the horse race track.

Fairly amusing mayhem ensues of course. The gang manage to get to see a race and get so excited they decide to hold their own race. Though being kids their steeds are not thoroughbred race horses but a motley assortment of cows, goats and mules. Who end up getting drunk...

The film stays fairly low brow but is funny enough not to outstay it's short feature welcome which is just as well because there isn't a great deal of story here. It is nice and charming however.