Thursday, May 18, 2023

Timelock (1995)

A terribly poorly made low-budget science fiction film that somehow is brilliant.

We are in the future and prisoners serve their time on brutal prison asteroids. Riley (Arye Gross) is on a prison transport to serve his time but his fellow cons including Villum (Jeffrey Meek) have dark plans to take over the prison and release the hyper dangerous McMasters (Jeff Speakman). Riley has to team up with the transport pilot Teegs (Maryam d'Abo) in a desperate battle for survival.

This is complete nonsense and has the budget of a cheese sandwich. The lack of budget is hidden in that time honoured way by making sets as dark as possible. So, this film should be awful but because the performances of the leads range between highly charismatic and downright camp the film is very watchable and the sheer craziness of some of the events is quite compelling viewing. 

It really shouldn't work but somehow..

Wednesday, May 17, 2023

No Hands on the Clock (1941)

A complicated and fast moving crime drama.



Humphrey (Chester Morris) is a private detective who is good at finding people, in fact he married Louise (Jean Parker) who he managed to find! Humphrey is sent, even though he is on his honeymoon, to Reno to find a missing man. Unfortunately this new task soon involves Humphrey and Louise in a bank robbery, a kidnapping, various women with different hair colours, accused of murder, getting shot at and even hunted by the FBI!

This has a complicated plot with more suspects and angles every time you look. What makes the film is the banter and interplay between Morris and Parker. This gives the film a light and breezy air and is highly entertaining, even if its hard to really know whats going on half the time.

Tuesday, May 16, 2023

The Street Fighter (1974)

One of the most violent films ever made, a brutal martial arts epic.

Terry (Shin'ichi Chiba) is a master of karate and kung fu who trades his skills for evil. He is hired to kidnap the daughter (Yutaka Nakajima) of a business man by the yakuza and mafia in order to secure a lucrative oil deal. However, when the mobsters refuse his price they try and kill him. Terry instead switches sides to protect the daughter after all...

And much bloody violence ensues. The film goes out of it's way to portray the savagery of the violence including in one scene where we switch to an x-ray view to see how Terry's fist caves in his victim's skull! 

The story is rather simple but also confusing in the best tradition of 1970s martial arts film and of course ends with a final showdown. Exhilarating and also with some heart with Terry's rocky but ultimately doomed friendship with Goichi Yamada quite touching.

Monday, May 15, 2023

Love Bound (1932)

At times a bit dreary but ultimately the voyage is worth it.

Wilson (Natalie Moorhead) is a gold digger and black mailer who gets involved with older rich married men and then threatens to wreck their families by telling about untrue affairs if they don't pay up. 

Businessman John Randolph is one such victim, but his wife wants to leave him already. The son, Richard (Jack Mulhall) persuades his mum to stay as dad is innocent and then he goes in pursuit of Wilson on an ocean voyage. He decides to pose as another sucker to prove Wilson's scheme...

So, naturally the story has a simple idea with various layers of complexity and characters of varying importance laid on. The film is difficult to get going but is fair enough when the voyage is progressing and does indeed have an exciting conclusion. 

Friday, May 12, 2023

The Fat Spy (1966)

Teen drivel so intensely awful it will probably make you question your life decisions.

A bunch of teens head off, amid much surf guitar music, to a near deserted island. The owner of the island George (Brian Donlevy) doesn't want the island's secret discovered so he sends his daughter Junior (Jayne Mansfield) to see what is going on and get rid of the teens. What is the secret? Well that the island is where the fabled fountain of youth is located apparently. Junior is more interested in seeing her boyfriend Irving (Jack E Leonard) who lives on the island, though he is more interested in plants. Much inane antics and music (and a lot of dancing by scantily clad young people - being spied on by old men natch) take place...

So, this isn't a great film. It is light and cheaply made. So cheap in fact they ran out of money so didn't film the end of it. However, it isn't all bad (just mostly) - some of the music is in fact rather good.