The Skull (1965)

A superbly creepy supernatural horror. Maitland (Peter Cushing) and Phillips (Christopher Lee) are keen researchers of witchcraft and always looking for interesting items to further their research. Marco (Peter Wymark) brings Maitland a book about the Marquis de Sade... bound in human skin. But that's not all... he also has the skull of the Marquis de Sade himself!

The skull once belonged to Phillips but was stolen from him... but he is not keen to get it back. He tells Maitland the skull is possessed by demonic forces. This doesn't put Maitland off but when he goes to Marco's to buy it he finds the man killed. When Matland has the skull she soon finds dark forces are also driving him... to kill his own wife (Jill Bennett)...

The film is tremendous fun, maybe verging on cheese at times especially when the skull flies around the room. Everything is saved by the great cast. The horror is mostly by suggestion instead of overt gore but that usually makes for a better horror film.

Knee Deep in Music (1933)

A curious but enjoyable little film. A tycoon (Nat Carr) seeks a song to sell his tinned fish on the radio. He hires Ruth Etting for the job but the search is on for the correct song. This short film though is basically a vehicle to showcase Etting's singing with some light humour and even a bit of music industry satire added to pad the film out.

Her singing is pretty good though some of the other songs ain't so hot. But will any of the songs sell fish? The jury is out on that one.

Secret of the Incas (1954)

A rather shabby American adventurer in grubby khakis and a floppy fedora seeks hidden treasures in lost civilisations. But wait this isn't Indiana Jones but Harry Steele (Charlton Heston)! Steele is a shady bum who guides/rips off tourists in a remote Peruvian town while also seeking the gold and jewel encrusted star burst from the Incan Temple of the Sun.

He needs a plane though to get to Machu Picchu, his chance comes when fleeing Romanian lovely Elena (Nicole Maurey) arrives in town. He uses her as bait to steal a plane hired by the Romanian secret service. He and Elena begin a trip through jungle and across mountains until they reach Machu Picchu. There to his dismay he finds there is already a party of archaeologists led by Dr Moorehead (Robert Young) and who have already found the tomb...

A very satisfying adventure, Heston plays Steele as a real anti-hero (though turns out to be the good guy in the end which is perhaps a bit of a cop out), he doesn't want to find the Incan relic to advance our knowledge of history but to become rich! The film is worth seeing for the number of scenes ripped off in Raiders of the Lost Ark nearly thirty years later. The rather extraordinary singing by Yma Sumac is also something which deserves a watch (or listen).

Stargames (1998)

A bizarre low-budget science-fiction film. Lugos (Conrad Haden), a giant bug who wears a rug, wants to conquer the universe of course. The ruler of the universe is.... Tony Curtis! Or rather Curtis playing King Fendel. Fendel sends his grandson Kirk (Travis Clark) off to Earth for his own safety...

Meanwhile on Earth video gamer Brian (Trevor Clark) is hating bring dragged into the countryside by his parents. He gets lost in the woods after being chased by a bear and bumps into Kirk. Together with Kirk and his magic watch Brian then has to fight Lugos' somewhat inept warriors and finally Lugos himself...

The special effects are poor even for the period and most of the film consists of aimless running around in the woods. The acting is almost universally terrible and the prop and costume design awful. Kirk for example looks like he is a page boy in a Regency drama, Lugos' warriors look like Lego people.

In the tradition of low-budget trash movies everything is unintentionally hilarious... especially the hologram computer Happy (Daran Norris) which uses the avatar of a clown! The sheer strangeness makes the film worthwhile.

The Headless Ghost (1959)

A light hearted ghost story. Three foreign exchange college students visit a dusty old castle owned by the Earl of Ambrose (Jack Allan). He tells them that the castle is haunted but Americans Bill (Richard Lyon) and Ronnie (David Rose) scoff at this. They decide to stay in the castle overnight with Ingrid (Lilane Sottane) to find out the truth.

Stuck in the castle, they find indeed there are ghosts. In fact there seem to be ghosts everywhere! Most of the ghosts are manifested as voices but there is also the Fourth Earl (Clive Revill) whose portrait comes to life... and a knight in armour wielding an axe! The three students eventually meet a headless ghost and are told they cannot leave until they find his missing head!

The scares are fairly low-thrill and offer a rather stereotypical view of castle life. The comedy is about as weak as the horror element but the film is reasonably entertaining. At times it  resembles a medieval reenactment with overly keen amateurs and that does add an element of (probably) unintentional fun.

Ruby (1977)

This is a very strange film. In 1935 Ruby (Piper Laurie) is so shocked by the brutal gunning down of her boyfriend by gangsters that she gives birth. Sixteen years later she is a drunk who owns a sleazy nightclub (that never seems to have any customers) and a drive-in movie theatre (which has plenty of 1950s stereotypes). Her daughter Leslie (Janit Baldwin) is a mute with staring eyes who bites random people. For some reason she now employs the guys who killed her man at the theatre.

And then they start getting bumped off one by one in horrifying (in theory) / ridiculous (in practice) including the movie projectionist who is menaced by a film reel and strangled by film stock. As Ruby continues to prance about drunk in a fur coat strange voices are heard. Is the spirit of her dead boyfriend somehow out for revenge and using Leslie to carry out the murders? Meanwhile Ruby's new beau Vince (Stuart Whitman) wanders around looking as confused as most the audience...

Although it makes little sense, the gore and special effects are often laughably poor, the film has an irresistible camp quality about it. The cast generally do a good job with the weirdness and supernatural nonsense.

Fire Over England (1937)

A quality historical romp. With England under threat of invasion from the Spanish Armada, Queen Elizabeth (Flora Robson) treads a thin line between appeasing the anger of Spain and rejoicing in the heroics of the likes of Sir Francis Drake. Meanwhile in Spain young Michael (Sir Laurence Olivier) escapes the clutches of the Inquisition and eventually makes his way back to the English Court...

He is reunited with his love Cynthia (Vivian Leigh) one of the ladies in waiting. However soon he must return to Spain in place of the traitor Vane (James Mason) and discover the secret plans of the King of Spain (Raymond Massey) before it is too late...

A superb adventure with plenty of swashbuckling. There is also much intrigue in Court (though some of the historical details may be a bit off). Although the love of Michael and Cynthia is central to the film it is Elizabeth who steals the show of course, if history can be considered a film then she always had some of the best lines.

The Magic Christian (1969)

A number of British satirical films in the late 1960s / early 1970s felt like they were produced with the assistance of weapons grade acid and this film is no exception. The richest man in the world Sir Guy Grand (Peter Sellers) adopts a penniless hobo Youngman (Ringo Starr) and proceeds to demonstrate to his son that every man has his price in a rather formless and frequently bizarre series of scenes packed full of guest stars.

We have Spike Milligan, for example as a traffic warden who eats a ticket for cash and Richard Attenborough who persuades his Oxford boat crew to cheat in return for the contents of Sir Grand's briefcase of cash. All things come to a head on a luxury cruise ship (the Magic Christian) which for some reason has a vampire aboard (Christopher Lee of course), the engine room also consists of topless women rowing while being whipped by Raquel Welch...

Other people appearing in cameos include John Lennon, Michael Aspel, Yul Brynner, John Cleese and many more. It is quite an extraordinary film and has a tremendous soundtrack with songs written by Paul McCartney and performed by Bad Finger. However does any of it make any sense? Probably not. But is it supposed to? The film is very Monty Python at times and also very bonkers and frequently vulgar. A film of it's time but what a great time.

Prisoners of the Lost Universe (1983)

A low-budget fantasy where our heroes are transported to a parallel universe where people fight with swords, wear loin cloths but still speak English. Dr Hartmann (Kenneth Hendel) has developed a way to transport objects between parallel worlds but falls onto his portal and is sent there himself. TV reporter Carrie (Kay Lenz) and electrician/kendo master Dan (Richard Hatch) also end up being transported after various displays of imbalance.

But where are they transported to? A strange world inhabited by giants in furs, midgets with flashing eyes and Kleel (John Saxon), an evil warlord who has imprisoned Hartmann as a sorcerer to do his bidding (though Kleel mostly seems to be interested in sleeping with his slave women and killing people). Carrie ends up a prisoner of Kleel while Dan enlists the help of The Greenman (Ray Charleston), Vosk (Larry Taylor) and Malachi (Peter O'Farrell) to save Carrie and defeat Kleel...

Although pretty low-rent, cheesy and unoriginal, the film is quite entertaining although is padded out with a little too much wandering aimless through the bush (which helped the budget no doubt). The leads put on good performances though especially Saxon. The concept and plot makes little sense of course but the sheer strangeness and camp will keep you watching.

The Key Man (1957)

A light and undemanding crime drama. Lionel Hulme (Lee Patterson) is the presenter of a popular true crime show on the radio. When he investigates the case of a convicted murder Smithers (Philip Leaver) who has now been released but gone to ground. Smithers is thought to have been behind an unsolved robbery. Lionel and a mysterious hidden bad guy are both trying to find where Smithers hid the loot...

Lionel tracks down Smithers with the help of Smither's gal Gaby (Hy Hazel) and he agrees to split the loot with Lionel but Lionel has to retrieve it himself from a safety deposit box...

The film is competent if not thrilling and with a rather simple plot though does have some nice stylish flourishes including a fight in a barber shop. In tone the film is not unlike a comic strip or 1930s serial and that isn't a bad thing by any means.

The Mummy's Shroud (1967)

A good Hammer horror involving mysterious occurrences in the desert. During the days of ancient Egypt we at first see the story of an overthrown pharaoh and his son who is eventually entombed by his faithful slave Prem (Dickie Owen) in the desert. Now in 1920 Prem himself is a mummy in an Egyptian museum and the pharoah's tomb has just been discovered by a team financed by the rather overbearing Stanley Preston (John Philips) and led by Sir Basil (Andre Morell).

Once the pharaoh's remains, which were wrapped in a shroud, are bought to the museum and reunited with Prem the troubles begin. The members of the party start dying one by one. Is it the work of the crazed tomb guardian Hadmid (Roger Delgado) or is it Prem himself?

The story is straightforward and as seen many times. This isn't the best Mummy film ever made but far from the worst. The film looks good and has enough thrills and chills to keep one entertained. One of the best parts of the film though is the narrated section in ancient Egypt, that story would have probably made for a decent film on it's own.

King Solomon's Mines (1937)

Epic adventure in deepest darkest Africa. Irish miner O'Brien (Arthur Sinclair) heads off looking for King Solomon's diamond mines and thus become the richest man in the world. His daughter Kathy (Anna Lee) enlists the help of English game hunters and adventurers Quartermain (Cedric Hardwicke), Curtis (John Loder) and Commander Good (Roland Young) plus the rather mysterious Umpopa (Paul Robeson) to help her find her father... and plenty of diamonds.

The adventure takes them across blistering desert and up mountains until they reach the mines guarded by a native tribe. Umpopa finally reveals that he is the true tribal king who had been usurped, obviously his usurper Robert Adams is rather keen that their adventure now ends...

A well-paced adventure, the wonderful backdrop of Africa adding tremendous presence. The wonderfully deep voice of Robeson also adding as much presence. Of course the stereotypes are a bit dated nowadays (though if we are to be honest Anna Lee's terrible "Irish" accent is probably the worst culprit) but that doesn't detract from the old fashioned but glorious fun.

To Love Ferrari (1994)

The Ferrari in the title being a girl played by Vivian Chow not a car. Though she does get to drive one at the end of the film.

This is really half film half early 1990s cantopop music video, even down to a bizarre fight sequence where the heroes can only fight while listening to Grasshopper. And when the ghettoblaster is destroyed Vivian leaps onto some oil drums to hammer out the beat so they can fight on. No really.

Vivian plays a girl who dreams of being a singer, she is loved by two guys. They fight, balls get released onto the floor of a dancefloor and Vivian ends up going head first into some electric lights. She ends up blinded, her dreams of being a singer are shattered. Her brother's club gets involved with some minor hoodlums and Vivian is kidnapped. Of course she gets electrocuted again and cured. If only the world of real medicine was as miraculous as in the movies...

Nonsense of course but very watchable and typically cross genre like many HK films. If you like early 1990s cantopop then the soundtrack is great. The film is worth watching just for the tunes and the zaniness of HK pop culture back then.

Escape from Alcatraz (1979)

The notorious Alcatraz was the most secure prison ever built, no one escaped from it... until three men did. Frank Morris (Clint Eastwood) has arrived in the prison after a conviction for bank robbery. With the Anglin brothers John (Frank Ward) and Clarence (Jack Thibeau) he decides to escape the jail when he finds that salt water (the prison is an island in San Francisco Bay) has made the concrete around the ventilation grill in his cell weak and he begins to chip away...

Over long months a careful plan is formed, amid harassment by the Warden (Patrick McGoohan) and violent fellow cons. Frank and his compatriots will chip away at the concrete around the grills, remove the grills and then slip away. They then try and escape the prison in roughly fashioned rubber dinghies...

The film is based on a true story and implies the escapees got away (their ultimate fate is still unknown). An intelligent film full of details and suspense. It has some great performances especially by Clint Eastwood.

The Ghost of Monk's Island (1966)

A delightful Children's Film Foundation film. Four children (Pierre Bedenes, Lucinda Jackson, Peter Bartlett and Robert Bartlett) are allowed off to sea on their own but run into trouble. They eventually land on tiny Monk's Island which, they are told by Eli (Conrad Phillips), is now uninhabited... except for the ghost of a monk.

While the search for the children continues news comes in that a convict (Jerold Wells) has escaped gaol and has been seen in the area. Meanwhile why does Jacob (Ivor Salter) seem to want to discourage Eli from checking Monk's Island? Meanwhile on the island the children (who seem to be able to find anything they need including string in abundance) start seeing the ghost of a monk...

A wonderfully nostalgic film when kids could be left to play all day on their own, and when boys carried knives it was to help them make kites, stockades and other boy scout antics. The film is full of the sort of things that used to fascinate children like abandoned houses and mysterious tunnels in a simpler, more civilised age...

Flight to Mars (1951)

A fairly generic early 1950s science-fiction film (evil aliens, rockets seemingly lashed up in a back yard, strange alien windows) though one with superb set design. A group of scientists set off on a mission to Mars but their rocket is damaged en route so they end up crashing on the planet... luckily right next to the entrance of the Martians' underground city.

The humans which include Steve (Cameron Mitchell), Carol (Virginia Houston) and Dr Jim (Arthur Franz) are met by Ikron (Morris Ankrum) the leader of Mars. The Martians have an advanced society and offer to help the humans repair their rocket ship. But Ikron secretly wants to steal the technology so he can conquer Earth. Luckily Martian lovely Alita (Marguerite Chapman) warns them of the plans...

So the plot has little surprises, though is fast moving. The futuristic set designs and weird fashions (the women wear outfits which looks like a mix of elf costumes and early Star Trek dresses, the men pseudo-fascist uniforms) look superb. Enjoyable sci-fi nonsense where (of course) the universe can be saved by an all-American fist.

Beauty and the Barge (1937)

A rather low energy but not unappealing comedy. Ethel (Judy Gunn) is engaged to marry but she hasn't seen her fiance for a few years and has changed her mind, though her father locks her up. She manages to escape just in time before the fiance shows up. She meets a young lieutenant (Jack Hawkins) who becomes smitten with her.

Ethel is helped by a Thames barge captain (Gordon Harker) who has a beau in every port and tavern along the river. He is smitten with Ethel though is also involved with Margaret Rutherford. A light farce follows.

The film is based on a play and this really shows at times as the dialogue often sounds like its being directed at a live audience. Not a laugh-a-minute comedy but enjoyable nonsense with one-dimensional stereotype characters. The now lost world of the Thames sailing barge is also interesting.

Arabian Adventure (1979)

A fun adventure romp. Evil magician Alquazar (Christopher Lee) is seeking the rose which will grant him ultimate power. Handsome young hero Prince Hasan (Oliver Tobias), after escaping Alquazar's dungeon, is tasked with finding the rose in return for hand of the lovely daughter Zuleira (Emma Samms). Hasan gains the help of the rather dodgy Khasim (Milo O'Shea), the boy thief Majeed (Puneet Sira) and a flying carpet!

Their adventure features all the usual Arabian fairy tale tropes including faces in mirrors and genies in bottles. But also fire breathing metal dragons! Hasan has been set up to fail, part of the evil plans of Alquazar. And who is the trapped soul in the mirror?

It is light and fun, the special effects are maybe a bit dated these days though add to the nostalgic feel of a classic children's adventure. The cast is good with some notable cameos from the likes of Peter Cushing and Mickey Rooney. Plenty of magic and plenty of swash buckling.

The Upturned Glass (1947)

A superb noir-ish crime drama. James Mason is a neurosurgeon who relates a story of murder and revenge to students... of course he is speaking about himself. Dr Joyce (Mason) meets Emma (Rosamund John) when he is treating her daughter Ann (Ann Wright). A romance begins between Joyce and Emma though they decide to end it for the sake of the husband. Then later Joyce hears Emma has thrown herself from a window...

Joyce can't believe she committed suicide and begins to look for the truth. His suspicion falls on Ann's sister-in-law Kate (Pamela Mason). Kate is a rather unpleasant selfish and money-grabbing young woman. Joyce begins a relationship with Kate with the aim of killing her the same way she caused Emma's death...

Not everything goes to plan of course. The film ends with a number of twists, it maybe ruins in some way the noir film film by becoming a bit of a melodrama. The performances are superb especially by Mason portraying a man who assumes he is sane and dispensing justice and not a crazed criminal but is he really any different? At the end we know the answer.

Rumpole's Return (1980)

Horace Rumpole (Leo McKern) indeed returned from attempted retirement in this TV movie. Having finally left the Old Bailey he tried to enjoy the delights of Miami with She Who Must Be Obeyed (Peggy Thorpe-Bates) but was soon back in London attracted by the case of a stabbing at Kentish Town tube station.

However Rumpole has difficulty getting back in chambers as the likes of Erskine-Brown (Julian Curry) and Featherstone (Peter Bowles) were rather hoping he would have stayed retired. He manages to get a pornography case though loses it, he is finally given the tube stabbing case in the hope one more failure could finish his career off once and for all...

Luckily for Rumpole a vital link to the crime is a religious cult based back in Miami so Rumpole gets his son Nick (Ian Gelder) to investigate...

Rumpole is on good form though the TV episode-nature of the usual Rumpole story is stretched to it's limit. There is a bit of padding but not enough to ruin matters. The on-location scenes in Miami add a bit of variety also seem to ultimately go nowhere.

Ten Little Indians (1974)

A lush Agatha Christie adaptation. A group of strangers are mysteriously assembled to a remote hotel in the Iranian desert by U.N. Owen (Orson Welles), the strangers who include Charles Aznavour (who of course gives us a song), Richard Attenborough, Herbert Lom, Adolfo Celi and Oliver Reed - all discover they have been bought together under false pretenses by U.N. Owen (or Unknown).

Then a tape is played where Owen's voice rings out, he tells them all they have gotten away with murder. Then the guests begin dying one by one. Who is the murderer? Is it one of the guests? Will any of them survive?

Although not the best version of this story, a bit slow at times, the sheer amount of star power and the surroundings especially the Persian architecture makes this film highly watchable and enjoyable. It is dark and suspenseful as such a situation should be.

Music Hall (1934)

Wonderful nostalgia. An old music hall managed by Bill (George Carney) has hit the skids and must close down. However in a last gasp to save the old place from being demolished and turned into shops and apartments the old founder of the hall Mr Davis (Wilson Coleman) returns to relaunch a refreshed music hall with new acts...

So basically the film has a bit of story just as a set-up before a list of acts. Including comedians, singers like G.H. Elliot, Dutchmen with accordions, footballers on bicycles, dancers (including the The Sherman Fisher Girls), performing animals and acrobats! If we are to be honest some of the acts were pretty ropey (bear in mind these were supposed to be fresher and better than the usual ones!)

You can't beat the nostalgia though. A glimpse of a now lost Britain from the interwar period, some things we now miss (xylophones) and others things we don't miss so much (blackface).