Contraband (1940)

An excellent little wartime spy drama. Andersen (Conrad Veidt) is the captain of a neutral Danish freighter which is impounded by the Royal Navy to check it's cargo. Two of his passengers, Mrs Sorensen (Valerie Hobson) and Mr Pidgeon (Esmond Knight), jump ship and head for London. Andersen goes in pursuit, he catches up with Sorensen and soon finds he is involved in a cat and mouse fight between British and German agents.

Andersen and Sorensen end up the prisoners of the Germans in a basement lair. Andersen manages to escape and enlists the help of some of his countrymen to save the day and more importantly Mrs Sorensen...

An exciting film full of derring-do that makes the most of a modest budget. Filmed when it was, just as the war was starting, the propaganda is dialled back and the Germans are mostly portrayed as doing their duty as opposed to just being evil. The growing relationship between Andersen and Sorensen is well portrayed and very believable.

Runaway (1984)

A rather strange, sometimes cheesy, but definitely fun future cop film. It is the near future (and looks like 1985) and robots are everywhere, doing everything from the cooking to construction. However, sometimes they go wrong and that is where the specialist police team led by Ramsey (Tom Selleck) comes in. Along with his new partner Thompson (Cynthia Rhodes) they chase and disable a runaway agricultural robot. But soon things become much more serious when they are called to the case of a robot which has killed people...

They discover the robot has been modified by an unauthorised microchip and under the control of someone else. That someone else is Luther (Gene Simmons), a rather over the top hoodlum and electronics expert, who wants to make these killer chips to terrorists and the mob. Ramsey seeks to stop Luther though he always seems one step ahead, plus he has a gun which fires heat seeking bullets...

A glorious mess of a film, completely ridiculous in many ways but always entertaining and with some interesting ideas about how technology would develop in the future (and they got a lot of things spot on). Tom Selleck seems a bit out of place in this film but that makes it all the more fun and to be fair he does a good job. Gene Simmons chews the scenery but it completely suits the film. Also look out for Kirstie Alley.

Once in a New Moon (1935)

What would happen if a sleepy English seaside village was sucked into space and became a new sphere orbiting the Earth? I'm sure it is a question everyone has asked at some stage, well here is the answer. 

Shrimpton-on-Sea is a typical English village with a well meaning but pompous Lord (Morton Selten) and the populace veering between fawning obedience and simmering revolutionary resentment. A passing dead star pulls the village off into space and it becomes Shrimpton-in-Space!

The postmaster and keen scientist Drake (Eliot Makeham) knows what is going on but the Lord and his committee of yes-men laugh at him... until he takes a boat to "circumnavigate" the globe in a few hours! They indeed are now on their own and cut off from the rest of the world. With every resource in limited supply the Lord orders a system of rationing but some voices start to call for the Lord's estate, and it's riches, be plundered for the good of all. Conflict sparks between the two captions...

A science-fiction tale but mostly this is an often funny satire on Interwar Britain with it's slightly shakey but still intact class system and the dark shadow of socialism threatening to cut the Lord off from his sherry. Drake's daughter Stella (Rene Ray) and the Lord's son Bryan-Grant (Derrick de Marney) provide the love interest, and of course another aspect of the class-divide which is explored in this film. Mary Hinton is perfect as the snooty Lady of the manor.

The Battle of the Century (1927)

A Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy comedy short most famous for it's custard pie fight! Before that though Stan Laurel is the world's most unlikely prize fighter and inevitably gets beaten. Oliver Hardy takes out an insurance policy on Stan (sold by the unscrupulous Eugene Pallette) and then tries to engineer an accident using a banana peel. Things don't go to plan of course and after the banana peel causes a custard pie salesman (Charlie Hall) to slip and fall all Hell breaks out in the resultant custard pie fight! 

The custard pie fight goes on for a long time, maybe too long but fulfils all the slapstick requirements of a comedy short of the period. The pie fight was said to have used at least 3, 000 custard pies (and maybe many more according to some sources!) This was one of the earliest official Laurel and Hardy films and they had yet to master their characters but the film is still good fun, though a bit disjointed due to missing parts of the film.

Assault on Precinct 13 (1976)

Gang violence is spiralling out of control in LA, after the police gun down members of one gang, it's leaders make a blood vow for revenge. Meanwhile Lt. Bishop (Austin Stoker) has gained a new assignment, look after Precinct 13's old police building on the last night before moving to a new building. His new "command" consists of a sergeant (Henry Brandon) and two secretaries (Laurie Zimmer and Nancy Kytes). But it will be a quiet night won't it?

Not quite, first of all a prison bus containing Napoleon (Darwin Joston) and Wells (Tony Burton) turns up requiring use of the cells. Then Lawson (Martin West) staggers in, on the run from the gang. He killed one of their members in revenge after they gunned down his daughter (Kim Richards) and now the gang are out for revenge themselves at any price. Bishop's police station is under siege but he lacks manpower. Can he trust those guys in the cells?

The siege is a thrilling battle for survival, the gang members are portrayed as a faceless and relentless army. The film is basically an old school Western or war film set in the modern city with a wave of "savages" mowed down by a small group of heroes. The film is violent and frequently dark, the senseless gunning down of a little girl buying ice cream for example. The gang's motivations are never explored, they just want to kill and no reason is given but that is one of the things which makes the film all the more scary.

Doctor in Distress (1963)

A typical early 1960s British comedy romp which were churned out by the dozen and one of the long-running Doctor series. The theme of the film is love with both Dr Sparrow (Dirk Bogarde) and Sir Lancelot Spratt (James Robertson Justice) both falling in love. Sir Lancelot needs the help from Dr Sparrow though in these matters of the heart.

As for Dr Sparrow he has fallen for one of his patients, an aspiring actress Delia (Samantha Eggar). Things take a turn for the worse when she heads off to Rome after getting a part in a film. Sir Lancelot is in love, for the first time, with Iris (Barbara Murray) the physiotherapist. To try and woo her he tries to lose his belly with the help of a corset and even enrols in a health farm!

Every situation of course ends up in predictable chaos and mild nonsense. Most of the jokes and situations are rather familiar but enjoyable enough. The likes of Leo McKern, Richard Briers and Ronnie Barker appear in minor roles, and spotting them is great - maybe the best part of the film. Its not earth shattering but plenty of fun.

Putting Pants on Philip (1927)

Although they had appeared together in a number of films beforehand (the first being 1921's The Lucky Dog), this was the first official Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy film. Ollie is at the docks waiting for his nephew (Stan) from Scotland. To his surprise, shock and the hilarity of everyone in town his nephew is wearing a kilt. That basically is the premise of the film, everyone finds a man in a kilt so funny, obviously they must be hard up for entertainment.

Fed up by all the attention, Ollie tries to get Stan some trousers. Stan isn't very keen on wearing them though, he is very keen on a flapper (Dorothy Coburn) though she doesn't exactly share the attraction.

So, a bit of a one joke film, which is fine if the joke is good but this one is a bit average. The film is watchable and quite funny but mostly of interest for historic value. The Laurel and Hardy double act was still a work in progress, soon it would conquer the world of comedy but not quite in this film.

Young and Innocent (1937)

An enjoyable Alfred Hitchcock crime drama that has the feel of a young person's adventure, thanks to its teenage lead. Robert (Derrick de Marney) is accused of killing an actress whom he finds on a beach. He protests his innocence but the police think they have their man. He manages to escape court and goes on the run with Erica (Nova Pilbeam), the young daughter of the police chief (Percy Marmont). At first Erica is reluctant and thinks Robert should give himself up (though could easily have given him up) then she begins to feel he is innocent and helps him find the proof...

They find a tramp called Old Will (Edward Rigby) who could recognise the real murderer (George Curzon). However, the police are hot on their heels, can they find the murderer before it's too late?

The film is fast moving, filled with wholesome thrills and amusing asides. It really is like a Famous Five adventure with Erica the wide eyed and naive but determined heroine against the grown-up world.

The Night Visitor (1971)

A wonderfully dark psychological horror. Salem (Max von Sydow) is in a Scandinavian lunatic asylum, a forbidding castle in the Northern wastes. However, he is accused of the murder of two women, Doctor Jenks (Per Oscarrson) even claims to have seen Salem. The Inspector (Trevor Howard) doesn't know what to think, he certainly finds Salem suspicious but how could he have escaped the asylum and get back in to his cell? In fact why would he go back? It seems to be impossible.

However, Salem has made it very possible with his ingenious escape methods using various hand-made tools and some impressive physicality. We know it is Salem in fact who has committed the crimes as we saw it at the start, but how does the Inspector sort it all out? In the end it all comes down to a witness in a most unfamiliar form...

A superbly dark film (except for the actual night scenes which are obviously filmed in daylight!) A twisted tale of betrayal and revenge. Although the plot might stretch credibility at times, the menacing air, bleakness of the settings and darkness of the soul that pervades makes this one of the better psychological horrors you will ever see.

Highly Dangerous (1950)

A rather far-fetched spy drama. Entomologist Frances Gray (Margaret Lockwood) is recruited by British Intelligence to go into a hostile European country to identity insects being used as a possible weapon. Despite no training and the barest of information, Frances arrives in the country - already to the attention of the chief of police (Marius Goring). Her agent contact Alf (Eugene Deckers) doesn't last very long and Frances finds herself arrested and being brutally interrogated...

However, something odd happens to Frances after she is given a truth drug. She suddenly acts like she is a daring secret agent straight out of the radio dramas she listens to! She enlists the help of an American reporter, Bill Casey (Dane Clarke), to carry out her mission...

Quite a ridiculous film though not without a degree of fun. Once Frances does change character it becomes a fast paced and exciting spy yarn, up until that point however the film is rather slow and cliched. Uneven nonsense but pretty enjoyable.

Double Whoopee (1929)

A classic Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy comedy short. Laurel and Hardy turn up at a posh hotel to work though are mistaken for a Prussian prince and his Prime Minister. When the real Prince (Hans Joby) does show up he ends up falling down an empty lift shaft a few times thanks to the new lift man Hardy!

Thats just the start of the mayhem Laurel and Hardy cause in the hotel, which includes a fight with a taxi driver (Charlie Hall) and the accidental near unclothing of a female guest (Jean Harlow). It all ends in a huge slapstick fight of course.

It is all very silly and very funny and plenty of slapstick. This was one of Laurel and Hardy's last few silent comedies, they would conquer comedy in the sound era of course.

Sons of the Desert (1933)

An all-time classic Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy film. Stan and Ollie are members of the Sons of the Desert lodge and they have pledged to represent their lodge at the convention in Chicago. Unfortunately Ollie's wife (Mae Busch) won't let him go so he concocts a devious plot with Stan and a crooked doctor (or actually a vet). He pretends to be ill and now has to go to Honolulu on vacation for his health.

Instead the guys go to Chicago and have a jolly time but then a disaster strikes... literally. The ocean liner they were supposed to be on sinks, their wives now thinking they might be lost at sea... though Stan and Ollie's appearance on a newsreel scuppers breaks their plan. Ollie makes up a bizarre story to explain how they came to be found in their wet pyjamas outside the house instead of on a rescue boat but is honesty the best policy?

This is one of the best Laurel and Hardy films and proves their humour could be stretched into a full-length film. The mix of slapstick interspersed with clever gags makes this film truly hilarious and totally essential. One of the best comedies ever made.

The Uncanny (1977)

A superbly weird horror anthology. Wilbur (Peter Cushing) is convinced that mankind's greatest enemy is... the domestic cat! He has compiled a large portfolio of evidence and is trying to get it published by Richards (Ray Millard)... who unfortunately for Wilbur's nerves has a cat! Wilbur tells three stories to demonstrate the feline menace...

The first takes place in Edwardian England. Miss Malkin (Joan Greenwood) is having her will rewritten to give everything to her many cats and not her feckless nephew Michael (Simon Williams). The maid Janet (Susan Penhaligon) is in league with Michael and schemes to get rid of the will. One copy is destroyed but Janet is foiled by Malkin and the cats to destroy the other. Michael and Janet's scheme has deadly consequences...

In the second story we switch to modern day (well 1970s) Quebec. Lucy (Katrina Holden Bronson) has moved in with her cruel aunt (Alexander Stewart) and even crueller cousin (Chloe Franks) after the death of her parents. All Lucy has is her cat... and a knowledge of witchcraft which comes in handy...

The final story takes place in 1930s Hollywood. After the death of Valentine De'ath's (Donald Pleasence) wife in an accident on the film set, he gets his mistress (Samantha Eggar) into the film instead. However, his wife's cat isn't going to let them get away with it...

A ridiculous premise maybe but the three stories are suitably creepy and camp. There is plenty of gore, some slightly dodgy (though sufficient) special effects and plenty of cheese. Also look out for a photo of Donald Pleasence in his Bond film Blofeld guise!

Unpublished Story (1942)

An engaging, if propaganda-ish, view of the Blitz and the fight against enemy agents in London. War reporter Bob Randall (Richard Greene) returns from Dunkirk to find London in a state of flux, though a peace group is trying to stop the war. He is sent to report on the peace group. While there, he finds his fellow reporter Carol Bennett (Valerie Hobson) is also attending and interested in the group... 

During a bombing attack, Bob and Carol discover that one of the members of the peace group, Trapes (Frederick Cooper), is distributing leaflets. Carol later tracks Trapes down to an air raid shelter where he admits he was wrong. However, when Trapes tells his superiors at the peace group of his change of heart and they arn't too pleased. While Trapes is a misguided idealist, it turns out the others in the group are Nazi agents...

At times this is a tough and realistic film which uses actual footage (then fairly recently shot of course) of bombed and burning buildings in London. Of course, due to the propaganda, everyone has the stiffest of lips and accept the destruction of everything they have held dear with a suitably chipper or matter-of-fact attitude. The Nazi agents, including Andre Morell, are also suitably sinister looking. Basil Radford plays an excellent role as the unflappable newspaper editor.

Horrors of the Black Museum (1959)

A superbly dark yet campy horror. Someone is killing young women in London with various gruesome methods including a guillotine. The police in the form of Superintendent Graham (Geoffrey Keen) are baffled by the crimes as there are no clues. However, noted crime writer Edmond Bancroft (Michael Gough) seems to have a lot of information on the crimes...

Which is no surprise because he has his own black museum filled with brutal and sinister weapons of murder, his assistant Rick (Graham Curnow) is using the weapons to commit the crimes thanks to the control exerted on him by Bancroft. However, Bancroft begins to become reckless as his chosen victims no longer are random but are scores to be settled...

Although very silly at times, Bancroft's "computer" is hilarious for example and some of the murders are completely over-the-top, the film has some moments of real campy horror. The police are completely hapless in this one, remaining fairly clueless despite all of the blatant clues left all over the place by Bancroft and Rick. A good fun horror film that is not to be taken seriously.

Rough Cut (1980)

An enjoyable crime caper with a few twists and turns along the way. Jack Rhodes (Burt Reynolds) is a top-class jewel thief who combines his life of crime with a public life of respectability and style. Soon to retire, DCI Willis (David Niven) wants to take down Rhodes before his career ends and finds the perfect way to finally get his man in the lovely form of another jewel thief Gillian Bromley (Lesley Anne Down).

Bromley is used to lure Rhodes into a big heist involving a diamond shipment to the continent. However, the reluctant Bromley - who has fallen for Rhodes - tells him about Willis' trap. Despite this Rhodes decides to continue with the plot, get the diamonds and evade the law. Indeed the complicated crime, which stretches credibility and common sense a tad, goes through without a hitch but is there a final twist in the tale?

Although somewhat far-fetched and a little slow to get going, the film is a perfectly good crime drama with a good cast. The chemistry of the leads adds a lightness to the film and the final action packed act makes everything worth while.

The Music Box (1932)

A hilarious comedy short as Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy are tasked with delivering a piano. The problem for the guys is that they have to carry the heavy crate containing the piano up a long flight of stairs. Various mishaps occur (of course) resulting in the crate ending back at the bottom of the stairs.

Finally the crate reaches the top of the stairs but the house owners are not in, Laurel and Hardy decide to basically break in and install the piano, cue more mayhem and destruction. When the house owner Professor von Schwarzenhoffen (Billy Gilbert) arrives home he is less than impressed with the piano never mind what has happened to his home...

A very funny film packed full of terrific slapstick and nonsense. Wonder too, despite many mishaps and crashing back down the stairs several times the piano is still undamaged when it is removed from the crate. It obviously was packed very well.

This film is an example (and there are plenty of others too) of Laurel and Hardy at their best. The staircase that causes them so much trouble still exists and is Los Angeles, you really wouldn't fancy carrying a piano up there.

The stair case, on Google Street View

False Faces (1919)

The story of a criminal (the Lone Wolf played by Henry B Walthall) who is tasked by the Allies in the First World War with stealing a cylinder containing vital information from behind the German lines. German agents are aiming to stop him of course, with the usual twist in movie land the head of the German agents (Lon Chaney) is the man who earlier killed Lone Wolf's sister and nephew...

Unfortunately this isn't that great a film despite the promising story. The film, made so soon after the end of the war, suffers from veering too much into propaganda. The Germans are portrayed as vicious animals, the Allies are perfect good guys of course. Most characters are fairly one-dimensional. The plot is also rather incoherent with a lot of back and forth shenanigans which have little end product. The scenes aboard a submarine are ridiculously unrealistic. 

An interesting watch from the point of view of an early war film but thats it! The film has some interesting ideas, such as the use of ghosts to portray guilt and torment but the execution is usually pretty flawed.

The Adventures of Tartu (1943)

A truly excellent wartime espionage film. Terence Stevenson (Robert Donat) is a bomb disposal officer dealing with unexploded bombs during the Blitz. As if that isn't dangerous enough he is chosen to head to Eastern Europe to infiltrate a German factory in Czechoslovakia which is producing a new deadly chemical weapon. Unfortunately for Terence, who uses the cover name Jan Tartu, his contacts are captured by the Gestapo before he can make contact.

He takes board at a house but quickly discovers that there is more than meets the eye to Maruschuka (Valerie Hobson) and Paula (Glynis Johns) who he both suspects are involved somehow with the underground. However, Maruschuka thinks Terence/Jan is a Gestapo agent and tries to get the German officer sweet on her (Walter Rilla) to kill him! Luckily she discovers that Terance/Jan is the real deal just in time but as the Germans are getting ready to produce the first shipment of gas can a successful sabotage mission be staged?

The film travels at a fast pace and leaves little room for much subtly but has an exciting plot with plenty of twists and turns. Although the film has unmistakable propaganda touches, it also has room for a great deal of shade. Is Maruschuka a collaborator or an agent herself? Does Terence really know what he is doing? The chemical factory sets are very impressive and wartime footage is cleverly interwoven into the film. 

The Challenger (1979)

High octane if somewhat repetitive kung fu action. Chin (Norman Chu) is working his way through all the martial arts schools in the lands, challenging the masters in order to find the man he wants to kill. Yu (David Chiang) is also challenging people left, right and centre but because he wants money. Yu notices that Chin is loaded and challenges him, their fight ends in a draw...

Wei Ching-Fung (Lily Li), the madam of the casino/brothel, gets involves with both men but unknown to them she is the woman of the man Chin is looking for, Master Pao (Philip Ko). Wei hires Yu to get rid of Chin but they end up uniting in order to fight Pao in a final epic showdown...

The film has a lot of fighting scenes, and they are good, especially the final battle. However, a little more plot might have helped to space the fights out. The film has a number of comedy numbers which verge between cringe and awful. A good if uneven kung fu film with impressive and charismatic performances by the principles.

The Spanish Cape Mystery (1935)

An enjoyable Ellery Queen murder mystery. Ellery (Donald Cook) and Judge Mackin (Berton Churchill) head off to California on holiday. Immediately they are drawn into a crime mystery as Stella (Helen Twelvetrees) is found bound and gagged in their chalet after her uncle has been apparently kidnapped. When they return Stella to her parents' home they find the first of a number of murders has been committed...

While Sheriff Moley (Harry Stubbs) stumbles his way through the crime scene, Ellery pretends he is not interested in the situation though he is very interested in Stella. He, of course, manages to discreetly steer Moley away from arresting everyone on sight while finding the real culprit...

A very agreeable country house mystery with a number of possible culprits and red herrings. A seasoned crime film watcher will probably quite quickly realise what is really going on but this is a well made little murder mystery.

The Fourth Protocol (1987)

A tense and layered spy drama. The head of the KGB has a dastardly plan to split NATO apart. They send Petrofsky (Pierce Brosnan) to the UK with a very important mission: to build and detonate a nuclear bomb at a US airbase! The mission is above top secret with a string of permanently silenced agents left behind as Petrofsky gets ready. MI6 are already on the trail though with Preston (Michael Caine) investigating the smuggling in of nuclear material...

Caine plays a great role here as the agent hated by his superior and under an official cloud, but will save the world anyway. He does this with plenty of surveillance, wading through records and not a small amount of violence. 

Brosnan also plays a good role as the cold and smooth agent whose only real weakness is that he is rather horny. Ned Beatty and Ian Richardson also star as senior and double-dealing officials on either side.