Forbidden Jungle (1950)

Limited but largely inoffensive sub-Tarzan nonsense.

Big game hunter Burton (Don Harvey) turns up in the jungle with a group of natives and a tiger in a cage, however he is not here to massacre defenceless animals, he is hunting for a boy. A boy who is rumoured to have been bought up by chimpanzees after his parents were killed in a plane crash. That does sound a bit familiar doesn't it?

Tawa (Robert Cabal) has in fact been bought up by Trader Kirk (Forrest Taylor) and his friendly natives who live alongside chimps. Burton tries to lure Tawa back to civilisation using the image of the lights of Broadway as the best thing in the universe. This is truly a very strange film.

Not a great deal happens in this film, it has all the usual jungle and noble savage tropes and is padded out with plenty of stock footage of wild animals. Ray "Crash" Corrigan also turns up with his gorilla suit to do his usual unconvincing ape act. Not a good film by any means but watchable enough especially if you like seeing chimpanzees messing about.

Taxi Driver (1976)

A classic dark tale of a troubled man pushed over the edge.

Travis (Robert De Niro), a veteran and somewhat mentally unstable, takes a job as a taxi driver on the night shift as he can't sleep. Here he is exposed to all of the sin of the big city lights, some of which he likes to partake in especially porn. He falls in love with (or maybe obsessed with) Betsy (Cybill Shepherd) who is working for an aspiring politician, though his date with her ends badly when he takes her to a porn cinema!

Travis then sees Iris (Jodie Foster), a twelve year old prostitute pimped by Sport (Harvey Keitel). Travis tries to get her to leave her terrible life. He shaves his head and heads out with his guns, he wants to save Iris and make a difference and doesn't expect to survive...

A superbly crafted and paced film, a true highlight of 1970s cinema. A story that will shock but also surprises, especially the final twist.

Thrill of Youth (1932)

This promises a lot though largely fails to deliver. It remains an average though not uninteresting view of early 1930s society.

Big game hunter Chet (Matty Kemp) returns, from butchering innocent animals, to his neglected girlfriend Marcia (Caryl Lincoln). However, Chet isn't very faithful, and soon he is chasing the local vamp Jill (June Clyde). Unfortunately Chet's brother Jack (Allen Vincent) is also very keen on her. Things get very complicated when Jack and Jill spends the night together (innocently) at a log cabin leading to conflict between the brothers...

Pre-code but fairly tame nowadays, and probably not that racy back in 1932 for most. The plot doesn't make a great deal of sense, with various threads left up in the air. 

Dead Heat (1988)

A cheesy zombie buddy cop movie, which somehow is brilliant!

LA cops Roger (Treat Williams) and Doug (Joe Piscopo) investigate a series of brutal robberies by men who are very hard to kill. Coroner Rebecca (Clare Kirkconnell) discovers that the men are zombies, bought back to life somehow using chemicals and something else. Roger and Doug track down these chemicals to a shady bio-tech company where they discover bizarre human experiments taking place, including bringing the dead back to life. After Roger is killed by the company's henchmen, Rebecca and Doug bring Roger back to life as a zombie cop!

Roger unfortunately only has a few hours before his body breaks down. With the help of the company's former PR head Randi (Lindsay Frost) they discover a shadowy plot to give the rich immortality, after a fee of course. Quite how is Loudermilk (Vincent Price) involved?

A terrific action romp of a film, part buddy cop, part zombie horror. At times it gets very gory indeed, and also pretty violent. A highly entertaining film which maybe shouldn't be but the makers and cast managed to pull off a bit of magic here.

Look out for a number of interesting appearances as well as Price in one of his last few films, including Robert Picardo (Star Trek Voyager's EMH) and Keye Luke who was of course Charlie Chan's Number 1 son!

Bulldog Drummond's Revenge (1937)

Another in the long-running Bulldog Drummond series, more exciting spy adventures in a Britain which always seems covered in fog.

Drummond (John Howard) is ready to head to Switzerland with Algy (Reginald Denny) and Tenny (E.E. Clive) so he can finally marry Phyllis (Louise Campbell). However, a evil (if somewhat inept) group of plotters are planning to steal a terrible new explosive and of course Drummond and company get dragged into Neilson's (John Barrymore) case. 

The gang steal a suitcase of the explosive from an aeroplane but the suitcase ends up in Drummond's hands. The gang steals it back but everyone ends up on the same boat train to Paris for confusing escapades on a train and then a boat...

A good fast paced adventure though containing nothing you haven't seen before (especially if you have seen other films in the series). The character ensemble perform their usual quips or faints. A perfectly enjoyable film.

House of the Black Death (1971)

A rather low-rent and low-energy Satanic horror... not that there is that much horror. Plenty of Satan though.

The Desard family have been cursed by Demonic forces for centuries. Now the two brothers Andre (John Carradine) and Belial (Lou Chaney Jr) are competing warlords invoking the power of Satan to control the local village and estate. Visiting scientists Dr Mallory (Andrea King) and Dr Campion (Jerome Thor) naturally scoff at such superstitious nonsense.

But the Satanic battle is real, though mostly seems to consist of scantily clad women gyrating and writhing and plenty of calls to Satan. To be honest about 50% of the dialogue of this film is the word "Satan" and there is a lot of dialogue in this film. Actual visual horror is in short supply though the film is undeniably a bit creepy but isn't very scary. And really isn't that good.

Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels (1998)

A glorious mockney romp.

Geezah mockney Eddy (Nick Moran) enters a high stakes poker game with gangland boss Hatchet Harry (P.H. Moriarty), his stake raised by his three other geezah mockney mates (Dexter Fletcher, Jason Flemyng and Jason Statham). Although Eddy is a top card shark, Harry has a hidden edge... he cheats. Eddy loses his mates' money and ends up having to owe Harry half a million which is a lot of bread. Unfortunately for Eddy and his geezah mates, the money will be collected by Harry's hard men: Barry the Baptist (Lenny McLean) and Big Chris (Vinnie Jones).

Meanwhile a plot to get Harry some antique shotguns and a plan by Eddy and his geezah mates to steal money and cannabis results in a huge and bloody showdown...

None of it really makes sense, Eddy and his geezah mates act so naive and foolishly its a wonder they weren't brown bread years ago. The characters are ridiculous, one dimensional cartoon characters. But thats probably the point. This is a swagging and stylish and very violent film with cool scenes and cool music throughout.

Black Magic (1944)

A decent entry in the lengthy Charlie Chan series.

A man is murdered at a seance which Charlie Chan's daughter Frances (Frances Chan) was attending. The police detective (Joseph Crehan) forces Chan (Sidney Toler) to investigate the crime or his daughter won't be getting released any time soon. Chan's chauffeur Birmingham (Mantan Moreland) was also in the house as a servant, and thinks there are some spooky goings on. In fact everything spooky is really a trick...

A problem for Chan is that multiple attendees at the seance had motives. However, he begins to unravel a clever plot involving false identities, hypnosis and fiendish weapons...

There is nothing wrong with this film at all, the crime is inventive and the solving of the puzzle very satisfying. Its nothing really you haven't seen before with Charlie Chan, though him being assisted by a daughter instead of one of his sons is interesting. An enjoyable film. Interestingly Frances Chan played one of Chan's daughters in a much earlier film (1933's Charlie Chan's Greatest Case) in the series too!

Geisha Girl (1952)

This could have been a decent enough spy drama though is let down by whimsy and stereotypes.

Rocky (Steve Forrest) and Archie (Archer MacDonald) are two American soldiers on leave from the Korean War. They head to Tokyo, there they find their uniforms keep them out of interesting bars. They instead buy some clothes from a Japanese tailor, by coincidence the shop is the front for a diabolically evil scientist who had developed a bomb so powerful it makes the atom bomb look like a firework. Archie heads off with an example of this new bomb (which is pill sized) in his pocket...

The gang leader Nakano (Tetsu Nakamura) invites the guys back to his home, where he just so happens to have a geisha school. The guys also bring along flight attendant Peggy (Martha Hyer) who is secretly an Allied agent. Nakano and his inept thugs try repeatedly to get back the pill-bomb...

Fairly light hearted and quite ridiculous, this could though have been a solid enough spy film but is let down by the ridiculous Archie character. Obviously used for comic relief though he mostly succeeds in being pretty annoying. The bizarre hypnotist Zoro (Dekao Yokoo) is quite something though.

Split Second (1992)

A complete mess of a film, which somehow works.

It is the future (well 2008 anyway) and London is semi-submerged due to the melting ice caps. Stone (Rutger Hauer) is a maverick cop with the London police who investigates a brutal killing in a club. It seems the murderer is someone who killed his partner years before and has a liking for tearing out human hearts. 

Stone is teamed up with eager young (and book learned) detective Dirkin (Alastair Duncan) to catch this serial killer. However, Stone doesn't believe the killer is human. Soon Stone and his girlfriend Michelle (Kim Cattrall) are being targeted by the killer, who seems impervious to their guns. So they obviously need bigger guns!

A complete car crash of a film with bizarre scenes, even more bizarre plot and even even more bizarre acting at times though Hauer, Duncan and Cattrall are great throughout. The film is utter nonsense but also utterly compelling and terrific fun. A film doesn't always need to make sense to be worth a watch as long as you can suspect believe long enough and enjoy the (soggy) ride.

Border Guns (1934)

A rather staid and strangely stilted Western.

Bill Cody, a rather eccentric cowboy, arrives in town and soon gets into a fight with Fred (Franklyn Farnum), the local tough. However, the fight is a draw and they become friends. We discover that Fred is rustling cattle to sell to Mexican rebels over the border and Bill offers to join the outfit. Soon though they are both fighting for the affections of the doctor's daughter Jane (Blanche Mehaffey)...

This truly isn't a terrible film, in theory. The story is basic but workable, the action is reasonable, Bill Cody has an odd charm. However, the execution is really off. The film is plagued by odd and awkward silences and stilted dialogue. Its unfortunate, there probably was a decent film in here somewhere but its been lost on the trail somewhere.

The Beatniks (1960)

Nice guy Eddie can't escape the Moon.

Eddie (Tony Travis) is part of a gang of loser punks including the ridiculous and somewhat unstable Mooney (Peter Breck) and Iris (Karen Kadler). When his singing is discovered by promoter Harry (Charles Delaney), Eddie is on a fast track to stardom. Unfortunately his gang hang onto him and drag him into their delinquent behaviour which includes murder...

A really low budget film, although called The Beatniks there arn't really any in this film though Mooney tries his best on the odd occasion to be hip in between periods of madness and scenery chewing. Eddie is such a nice guy, how he ended up leader of such a loathsome gang is the film's true mystery. 

Q: The Winged Serpent (1982)

A rather odd and also rather graphic film about an Aztec monster on a killing spree in New York.

Someone... or something... is killing people at random in NY. Detectives Shepherd (David Carradine) and Powell (Richard Roundtree) are on the case of some horrific murder cases of people being skinned alive. Are these linked to the other murders, which some eyewitnesses say are being done by a horrific looking flying creature? Shepherd begins to think so, investigating Aztec human sacrifices and the summoning of a winged serpent god (Quetzalcoatl natch), though the rest of the police are somewhat sceptical...

Low-rent cowardly crook Jimmy (Michael Moriarty) is less sceptical, especially after while on the run from the police he climbs to the top of the Chrysler building (a perfect Art Deco setting in this macabre film) and finds the creature's nest, including the remains of victims and a giant egg...

The film takes a while to come together, the early scenes with Jimmy seem completely out of place but eventually it all makes sense in a sometimes irreverent and satirical early 1980s style. The film reminds me a bit of Buckaroo Banzai at times, and as that is one of my very favourite films then that is, of course, a good thing. Not that this film is anywhere near as good as Buckaroo, it does drag at times but overall is a perfectly decent monster horror film with pretty good special effects for the day.

Prisoner of Japan (1942)

A reasonable early war film with unmistakable though not overbearing propaganda overtones.

David (Alan Baxter) appears to be a genial Westerner living on a South Sea island with his mixed race wife Loti (Corinna Mura). Certainly a number of US sailors are taken in, and even let slip a secret bit of information. That is a shame as David's set-up is a complete sham. Really the island has a secret Japanese base with a radio direction finder run by the sinister Matsuru (Ernst Deutsch). The US Navy soon loses another ship to Japanese bombers.

Toni (Gertrude Michael) turns up at the island hoping to reunite with David who she met once, though in his distressed alcoholic state he can hardly remember anyone. Toni and David are soon fighting Matsuru to prevent the Japanese attacking and destroying an Allied convoy...

Quite a reasonable war film that makes the most out of a tiny budget and more or less one set. Though don't ask why the "Japanese" commander is played by an Austrian man called Mr German.

A Virgin in Hollywood (1953)

A curious and generally pretty awful little film.

Darla (Dorothy Abbott) is a small town reporter who is sent to Hollywood to get the real deal on the home of dreams. Her trip to Hollywood runs into trouble almost immediately when she gets chased around some ruins by Playboy models. She also ends up in a rather tame burlesque club and encounters some of the strange menfolk (including a rather terrible comedian)... and womenfolk... of tinsel town in a series of "adventures".

A very strange film with a tiny budget, the running time padded out by inserted two out-of-context 3-D short films in the centre of it! Its a shame that this was long-time bit-part actor Abbott's only starring role, she deserved a lot better than this nonsense. Truly terrible - definitely one of the worst films ever made - though pretty compelling watching of course!

Stormy Trails (1936)

A pretty decent Western with a well developed plot.

Tom Storm (Rex Bell) is a rancher who blissfully unaware that devious Stanton (Karl Hackett) knows there is gold on Storm's land. Stanton has his henchmen rob the bank, putting pressure on the banker to foreclose on Storm. He also tries to have Storm sued by a disgruntled former cow hand (though Storm shoots him in the robbery). Storm gets involved with the lovely Connie (Lois Wilde) though her Dad (Lloyd Ingraham) is caught stealing gold on Storm's land...

If that enough Stanton also corrupts Storm's younger brother Billy (Bob Terry) though the kid has a change of heart with tragic results...

Ok so the plot is a bit complicated but it works really well, and mostly holds together and makes sense. There is some gunplay and good horsemanship but this is mostly a Western about plot not Colt 45s.

Night Vision (1997)

Violent, exploitative and quite odd. Yes its a pretty good film.

A deranged serial killer is slaughtering young women, his crimes videoed in excruciating detail and the videos then sold on the black market. Washed up cop Dak Smith (Fred Williamson) gets a break when he stumbles across the van of the killer, though when whoever is driving the van unleashes the heavy firepower Dak is lucky to survive.

Paired up with another cop under a cloud, O'Connor (Cynthia Rothrock) by the police chief (Frank Pesce) who hates him, Dak continues to look for the serial killer. The killer (Robert Prentiss) begins to target Dak and O'Connor with the help of his goons...

A violent film with plenty of gratuitous female nudity. The film certainly doesn't lack for thrills, the plot moving a pace and isn't very complicated in any case. Low budget but decent fun, it won't win any prizes but who cares?

Horrors of Spider Island (1960)

Rather low-rent horror with beautiful women on a tropical island... and spider men.

Gary (Alexander D'Arcy) and Georgia (Helga Franck) assemble a dance troupe of young women and takes them to Singapore... unfortunately their plane crashes in the Pacific. Joe and the survivors end up on a remote island. They discover that someone was living there but he is lying dead in a gigantic spider web!

A bizarre giant spider lives on the island. It attacks Joe who manages to kill it but it's venom turns him into a spider man. He then hunts the women... But then two guys turn up at the island and the women forget all about the spider threat until the end and the return of spider man for a final showdown...

A cheap horror romp, it doesn't make a lot of sense or have that much in the way of horror action though does show a lot of female flesh. Cheesy and vaguely exotic fun. The dubbing is sometimes hilariously bad.

The Sentimental Bloke (1919)

An interesting if not that enthralling early Australian film.

Based on a poem, this film recounts the story of an ex-convict called Bill (Arthur Tauchert) and a good old normal Aussie bloke. His life is turned around when he meets Doreen (Lottie Lyell), a good woman. So, this film is basically about the romance and has plenty of Aussie stereotypes.

The film is rather hard to follow at time though the wordy inter-titles packed full of Aussie slang are a treat. It is certainly an unusual film, unfortunately not that interesting overall but the historic value can't be denied.

Lightning Strikes West (1940)

Pretty decent if unsurprising Western fare.

Lightning Morgan (Ken Maynard) is a reluctant lawman who is is deputised by the Marshal (William Gould) to recapture Butch Taggart (Michael Vallon), a tough outlaw who has escape from prison. The loot from Taggart's last heist has never been found. 

Morgan disguises himself as a drifter bum and gets a job at a saloon owned by members of Taggart's gang. He discovers Taggart is indeed hiding in the saloon, planning to disguise his identity and then find the loot...

Not too original a Western, the story is pretty straightforward but very well done, apart from a few strange plot quirks such as when Taggart makes a big show of telling Morgan he can't leave the room, but he does anyway! The fighting and horsemanship are of a decent standard.

Woman Unafraid (1934)

An interesting story though not executed that well.

Policewoman Augusta Winthrope (Lucile Gleason) has a local dance hall on her beat. In the dance hall gangster Lewis (Jason Roberts Snr) is foiled by Augusta, who also rescues some of the unfortunate girls (not really elaborated on but basically prostitutes) at the dance hall. She puts them up at her own home. Lewis seeks revenge and murders one of the girls (Barbara Weeks), also manipulating local do-gooder Mrs Worthington (Laura Tredwell) to cause Augusta's suspension. Augusta's only chance to save the girls and save her job is to prove Lewis is a murderer and get him put away for good...

A decent crime story though let down by terrible pacing and a little too much padding by irrelevant characters. The film is worth sticking with, and isn't a long film (though feels a lot longer!)

Police Dog Story (1961)

A decent crime drama though as usual with these kinds of films homo sapiens is out acted by canis familiaris.

Rookie police man Edwards (James Brown) is selected for a new police dog handing department, unfortunately for him his dog is a rather boisterous Alsatian called Wolf. Despite early troubles Edwards and Wolf bond when man saves dog when he falls down a cliff. Edwards and Wolf become a formidable crime fighting duo. 

However, when Edwards gets mixed up with a crooked business owner and his old partner Bert (Barry Kelley), who is on the take, both Edwards' career and Wolf's life are in peril...

Apart from the addition of the dog, this is a fairly basic crime drama which is narrated by reporter Terry (Merry Anders), who is writing a feature on the new dog handling team and falls in love with Edwards. A decent if unexceptional film with rather dry dialogue and functional acting. Wolf is a good dog though for sure.

The Poseidon Adventure (1972)

The 1970s saw many disaster movies and this is one of the best of them.

The Poseidon is an elderly ocean liner on it's last trip across the Mediterranean when it is hit by a massive tidal wave. The ship is literally turned upside down. Preacher man Scott (Gene Hackman) takes charge of a group of survivors trapped in the ball room. He says that the only way out of the ship will be via the bowels of the ship, which are now above them!

With a motley collection of survivors including arrogant policeman Rogo (Ernest Borgnine), elderly couple Belle (Shelley Winters) and Manny (Jack Albertson) and teenager Susan (Pamela Sue Martin) and her annoying little brother Robin (Eric Shea), Scott leads his team through many dangers, not all of them surviving...

A well paced drama with just the right amount of human conflict to add to the series of dangers our heroes face. The set designs of the upside down ship are superb. An excellent film, any 1970s corniness cannot compete with the sheer adventure.