Oblivion (1994)

Quite what is going on here i don't know. The film is set on an alien planet in the future but everyone dresses and acts like they are in an old Western. 

A cruel outlaw (a reptilian of course) called Redeye (Andrew Divoff) guns down the Marshal (Mark Genovese) of the town of Oblivion and takes over with his gang, which includes Lash (Muscetta Vander) who likes to wear bondage gear and whip people. The Marshal's son Zach (Richard Joesph Paul) lives out of town, unwilling to get involved in any gunplay because he feels the pain of his victims (something which seems rather variable if we are to be honest). He saves the life of cod-philosopher Buteo (Jimmie Skaggs) from a giant scorpion and finally gets involved in the fight and faces Redeye and his crew.

The film doesn't make a lot of sense and is packed full of strange cameos and random events and characters including Gaunt (Carel Struycken), a strange Death character who naturally is the undertaker. One of the cameos is George Takai, who plays the town's drunk doctor. He throws dreadful Star Trek related puns into his dialogue at random. We also have Isaac Hayes as a bar owner. He just seems to be there, because why not?

By no means is this a good film but it's awfulness is truly compelling. A film that needs to be experienced.

The Perils of Mandy (1980)

A (very) cheap bit of soft-core British sex comedy trash. The perils of Mandy (Gloria Brittain) include being beaten by a pervy old school master, sex in a haystack and being tied to some railway tracks. I suppose it can vaguely bring to mind the film serials of the 1910s such as the Perils of Pauline, though in a rather more racey manner! 

Expect plenty of stockings and spenders, don't expect much in the way of coherence or plot or acting for that matter. Unfortunately we are to be forever left hanging with the cliffhanger as to whether Mandy survives her final peril or not as no "Part 2" was ever made.

The Shape of Things to Come (1979)

Star Wars spawned many space opera imitators which ripped off George Lucas' film to various degrees, this film tries to rip off a number of other films too. One thing it doesn't rip off is H.G. Wells' story, it has pretty much nothing to do with it despite his name in the titles. The excellent Things to Come already exists of course.

We are in the future, Earth is inhabitable following a robot war and mankind lives on the Moon and elsewhere in space. The Moon, however comes under attack by a suicide freighter sent by Omus (Jack Palance) from Delta 3, which is also where the drugs which mankind needs to survive come from. Dr Caball (Barry Morse), his son Jason (Nicholas Campbell), Kim (Anne-Marie Martin) and the exploding robot Sparks (Greg Swanson/Mike Parr) set off to stop Omus...

Meanwhile, on Delta 3 Omus and his army of ridiculous looking robots are evilly hunting down the last survivors of President Niki (Carol Lydney) and her supporters. Omus has a devilish machine that can melt minds too, quite why is not quite clear...

This isn't a terribly great film, the space effects are passable (on the whole) though the sets and costumes betray a lack of budget. The story is rather slow and meandering, including a detour to Earth which doesn't really go anywhere plot wise. It has the required camp value for a late 1970s space opera but lacks much of a spark, despite Sparks' efforts. Palance is superbly over the top as the evil Omus.

The Old Actor (1912)

A rather static though enjoyable little drama. 

An old actor (W. Chrystie Miller) loses his role at the theatre due to being too old, he is too embarrassed to tell his family of his failure and therefore uses his make-up skills to disguise himself and becomes a very convincing beggar to earn some coin. The beau (Edwin August) of his daughter (Mary Pickford) accidentally gives him a gold coin and in the kerfuffle his real identity is revealed...

A nice simple little film. Although the camerawork is very static, the little subtle touches and natural acting helps make the film very watchable and tells a good story.

Horror House (1969)

Swinging London hits slasher horror head on. Really this should be awful tosh (and many people will probably think it is) but... this film is brilliant!

A bunch of cool kids (well reasonably young adults anyway, and mostly not that cool) are having a groovy party which unfortunately is boring them. Chris (Frankie Avalon) leads them to an abandoned house out of town. However, as the kids are getting ready for a seance, Gary (Mark Wynter) is brutally murdered. Chris decides that they need to handle this themselves and so they bury Gary's body and seek to discover who committed the crime.

The viewer will of course suspect Bob (George Sewell) - definitely not a cool kid - who was having an affair with Sylvia (Gina Warwick) and was jealous when he saw Gary kiss her. However, it is soon clear there is something else going on...

The story doesn't really have much going for it being rather formulaic, the characters are mostly awful, the acting indifferent and the less we can say about the direction the better. However, somehow this film works and the slasher horror, though spare, does have an impact. Maybe it is the coolness of the setting in Swinging London, especially the interior furnishings of the various flats. A really enjoyable romp, despite everything.

Wonder Women (1973)

Completely incoherent, shamelessly exploitative and violent trash. I loved it obviously. 

Someone is kidnapping top athletes. In the Philippines, Harber (Ross Hagen) is hired to investigate the disappearance of one such athlete (whom we see captured by a number of young women and then taken away in a hearse). In fact this is a nefarious plot by Dr Tsu (Nancy Kwan) who is conducting medical experiments and plans to start doing brain transplants: transferring the brains of rich old people into young fit bodies...

Harber's investigation, which includes the seduction and long chase of one of Dr Tsu's henchwomen Linda (Maria De Aragon), takes him to the wonderfully Brutalist lair of Dr Tsu (which looks incredible, she doesn't look so bad either). Here he witnesses her twisted experiments and also indulges in a spot of brain sex with her. All hell is about to break loose of course...

A confusing film, especially in the last act which leaves many threads up in the air. Maybe they were expecting a sequel? Nothing really makes much sense and it is stacked high with 70s cheese and badly choreographed fights. You just wonder if the taxi driver (Vic Diaz) is still waiting for Harber on that island.

Warning from Space (1956)

A rather strange, sometimes charming but ultimately a bit dull science-fiction film.

Aliens visit Earth, their flying saucers flying over Tokyo. Unfortunately the aliens find, as they look like giant walking starfish with a single eye, cannot approach humans without sparking panic. The aliens indeed do want to desperately contact humanity as a giant meteor is heading to the Earth...

One of the starfish aliens therefore decides to disguise herself as a popular Japanese singer (Toyomi Karita)! Mankind is finally warned about the meteor and scientist Dr Kamura (Bontaro Miake) scrambles to develop a weapon to deflect it before it's too late. Things are complicated by enemy agents who want to use the weapon for themselves...

The film has a fair amount of Japanese whimsy though is a bit slow at times. The story is interesting if a bit vague at times, the aliens being the good guys a nice twist for a 1950s science-fiction film.