No Retreat, No Surrender (1986)

Martial arts nonsense with the worst Bruce Lee ghost ever. Jason (Kurt McKinney) is a modestly skilled, but overly Bruce Lee obsessed, student at his Dad's (Tomothy D Baker) karate school in LA. When his Dad gets beaten up by gangsters, who include Jean-Claude van Damme, and they decamp to Seattle. There Jason and his friend RJ (JW Falls) gets beaten up by both local thugs and his bitter Dad.

Jason appeals to Bruce Lee at his grave (which is in Seattle of course) for help... and what do you know but the ghost of Bruce (Tai Chung Kim) turns up and starts to train him. Jason turns from being a light weight bum to a super martial artist. Sooner or later Jason will end up fighting van Damme of course...

Often pretty cheesy but with plenty of 1980s cool, even some break dancing. The action is pretty decent and often great. The ghost of Bruce looks nothing at all like the real man, unfortunately there are plenty of photos and posters of the real Bruce in the background of the ghost scenes! The training scenes are interesting though and overall this film is one of the better 1980s US martial arts films. A hit... like one of Bruce's fists.

Voodoo Man (1944)

Enjoyable voodoo nonsense. Dr Marlowe (Bela Lugosi)'s wife died twenty years ago - though she is still intact and not aged somehow. The Doctor is capturing young girls with the help of his strange and motley collection of henchmen including John Carradine and George Zucco. He is trying to transfer the spirit of the living into his dead/not dead wife using voodoo magic.

When Stella (Louise Currie) is the latest victim of Dr Marlowe's evil scheme, young reporter Ralph (Tod Andrews) begins to investigate the strange Doctor, who has a group of young zombie girls in his basement. Unfortunately Ralph's fiance Betty (Wanda McKay) is the next target for Marlowe...

A silly and creepy film, the absurdity of the premise however makes the film pretty amusing. Everything is oddly low-key and slow, Lugosi and Zucco spend most of the film in matching black cloaks - with random occult symbols on them - chanting nonsense.

Pressure Point (1997)

A hilariously strange action film. Sebastian Dellacourt (Don Mogavero) is a government assassin, though doesn't really look much like a CIA killing machine. With his middle age spread and bald spot, he looks like a systems analyst working in local government. 

His mission to kill an ambassador in Chile doesn't go down too well and he ends up in prison after a rather inept snow speeder chase. But he is contacted by his ex-boss Neil Kennedy (Larry Linville) and given a new mission, he just has to escape gaol first. Luckily he seems to be in the easiest "maximum security" prison to escape from in the world.

His new mission is to infiltrate the militia of Arno Taylor (Steve Railsback) who seeks to overthrown the US government by blowing it up...

So this is a fairly low budget action film, the story line is pretty silly and much of the action is fairly generic (not all bad but the dynamite in the microwave is just ridiculous). The nonsense and strangeness makes the film watchable. Not great by any means but enjoyable.

Goodbye Bruce Lee: His Last Game of Death (1975)

Yet another variation of Game of Death and yet another middling Bruceploitation film. "Bruce Li" (Ho Tsung-Tao) is chosen by a producer to help finish Bruce Lee's final film and then we go straight into that film. In truth the film-within-a-film angle is completely pointless. What we do have is a basic story of Bruce getting duped into handling hot money and dragged into a gang fight.

And there are a lot of fights as the two rival gangs both try and get the money off Bruce. Finally the gangs unite and kidnap Bruce's girlfriend Lu (Mung Ping) and take her top of the Tower of Death. Bruce then has to fight the best fighters in the world as climbs the tower floor by floor to save his girl. The "best fighters" are actually pretty terrible and include a samurai who gets dizzy very easily, a boxer who doesn't look he could punch his way out of a paper bag and an "Indian" fighter who wields nunchucks - though doesn't really seem to know what they are. Finally he faces Boss K (Fei Lung) with a whip.

It isn't the worst Bruceploitation film, the story is simple but coherent. The fights range between mediocre to awful but are often pretty funny.

Streamline Express (1935)

A long time before HS2, a fast new monorail with ocean liner levels of luxury (and indeed size) is to make the inaugural trip between New York and California. Aboard are a motley collection of passengers with various back stories including Broadway star Patricia Wallace (Evelyn Venable) who has fled the set to run off to get married. The producer Jimmy Hart (Victor Jory) wants her back to stows away on the train...

Also aboard is blackmailer Gilbert Landon (Sidney Blackmer), he is involved in a love triangle involving John Bradley (Clay Clement) who is caught between his wife Mary (Erin O'Brien-Moore) and apparent new love Elaine Vincent (Esther Ralston)...

A neat but limited little film. The kind of light drama that is usually set in the likes of a posh hotel, but this one was on rails. The comedy is a little hard to come by and mostly involves the drunken passenger. The actual train itself is a lovely bit of Art Deco. Another example of Utopian thinking early in the 1930s before the war drums grew too loud to ignore. Imagine the world which this train and the Transatlantic Tunnel could have existed in, a shame the dream was soon to be shattered.

The Phantom of the Opera (1925)

Decades before the famous musical, is this early silent movie adaptation of the story of the disfigured opera lover who yearns for young love. The Phantom (Lon Chaney) is said to haunt the Paris Opera House. However, he is no ghost but a man who lives below the opera house. He forces the famous singer Carlotta (Virginia Pearson) to give up her starring role in the opera in favour of understudy Christine (Mary Philbin) whom the Phantom tutors (and loves). At first Christine is quite happy with her benefactor, despite the fact he lives in an underground dungeon. However when his mask is removed...

Christine is told by Erik (The Phantom) to devote her life to her art and to forget her fiance Raoul (Norman Kerry). However when Christine continues seeing Raoul, The Phantom finds out and makes her his prisoner...

This is a spectacular film, Lon Chaney stealing the show (literally) with his portrayal of the Phantom, a genius but trapped with his disfigurements and loneliness. Though any sympathy must be tempered with the murder and mayhem he unleashes on the opera house including some rather intriguing and gruesome death chambers.

The Atomic Man (1955)

An intriguing sci-fi / crime drama. A man is found floating in the Thames close to death after being shot. Reporter Delaney (Gene Nelson) discovers the man is top nuclear scientist Dr Rayner (Peter Arne). He is conscious but makes little sense. However there a twist... the man can't be Rayner as Doctor Rayner appears to be alive and well at a nuclear lab in London!

The mystery man in hospital is photographed by Rabowski (Faith Domergue) but a strange glow surrounds him in the developed photographs, a radioactive glow. But the Rayner in the lab has no glow. So what is going on and why does the man in hospital answer questions before they are asked? And who is the mysterious Vasquo (Vic Perry)?

A highly enjoyable film, more a crime drama with a little touch of science fiction added on. The crime drama is good. Well structured and coherent, Vasquo making for a good sinister villain. Nelson and Domergue make a nice pair as well. Look out for Charles Hawtrey in a small role.

Crime Doctor (1943)

Based on a popular radio drama. Back in the early 1930s a man (Warren Baxter) falls from a speeding car and ends up in hospital, with amnesia. He is unable to remember anything from his past and takes the name Robert Ordway. He eventually decides to become a criminal psychiatrist and returns to university. Within a few years we see that he is doing really well and working on the parole board...

However three members of a crime gang (John Litel, Don Costello and Harold Huber), who years ago did a heist but never got the money, recognise him. Ordway is actually Phil Morgan and was part of the gang. They think he is keeping the money for himself and is faking the amnesia. Naturally he regains his old memory in the time honoured movie method, another bump to the head!

A highly entertaining crime drama which fits a lot of story line into a fairly short film. Maybe Ordway is a little too good to be true with his progressive prison reform methods (for the day anyway) but the villains add the right spot of grittiness, and Grace (Margaret Lindsay) adds a welcome bit of glamour. A good film and it also started what turned out to be a ten film series of the Crime Doctor.

Superargo and the Faceless Giants (1968)

A rather strange Italian-Spanish superhero film. Top sports stars, including pro wrestlers, are being kidnapped by faceless (well kinda) robots and then bundled into the back of a Ford Transit van. The police can only call upon one man to fight this new menace... an ex-wrestler and now superhero who wears a red rubber suit and can float in mid-air (of course).

Superargo (Giovanni Clanfriglia) is that man, and is soon fighting the robots in various awkwardly choreographed fight scenes. He finds out that the mysterious Professor Wond (Guy Madison) is behind this menace. Superargo, along with his mentor Kamir (Aldo Sambrell), manages to get the help of Wond's assistant Gloria (Diana Loris) and infiltrates Wond's sub-Bond villain cavern lair...

It is all very silly of course, the light nonsensical plot merely a flimsy skeleton for a series of action scenes of varying quality. Very much a rip-off of 60s style superhero antics, even the music is vaguely Batman-esque. It is all a lot of fun.

The Pay-Off (1930)

Somewhat overly wordy but decent early talkie. A young couple (William Janney and Marian Nixon) are robbed of their wedding funds and therefore decide to get involved with crime (natch). They get involved with gentleman crime boss Gene (Lowell Sherman) who takes kindly to them. Gene's rival Rocky (Hugh Trevor) is pretty unimpressed and seeks to control the organisation himself.

Things come to a head when the gang plan a big hit but Gene doesn't want any bloodshed, much to the disgust of Rocky...

Although not that great a film. The plot is a little contrived at times though fast moving. Lowell Sherman plays a good part. The other actors verge between basic competence and almost awful.

Adventures of a Plumber's Mate (1978)

More low-rent British sauce and frolics. Sid South (Christopher Neil) is a plumber who uses his job to have his way with lonely housewives. Sid is also deeply in debt with the bookies, cockney geezer Blackie (Arthur Mullard) is threatening to put Sid is "horsepital" unless he pays up.

Sid has an adventure with a solid gold toilet seat and then seeks the help of Dodger (Willie Rushton) who offers him a succession of ridiculous minor crime jobs which all end in disaster for Sid...

A sex comedy but not one with a great deal of sex. Lots of female nudity though, actually lots and lots. It isn't that funny for a comedy either, more a mix of mildly amusing antics and over the top nonsense. It scores highly for British 1970s nostalgia and has some great stars including Stephen Lewis, Christopher Biggins and Elaine Paige. A mess but enjoyable enough.

Honor and Glory (1993)

Completely incomprehensible martial arts nonsense. The trigger from a nuclear weapon is stolen in Russia (although apparently it looks a lot like a Bulgarian dildo) and for some reason corrupt banker Jason Slade (John Miller) has it and is trying to sell it to the Arabs. Two sisters are investigating Slade, FBI agent Tracey (Cynthia Rothrock) and reporter Joyce (Donna Jason). Their Dad is a CIA agent (Leo Rocca) is also after Slade.

Meanwhile Slade's bodyguard Jake Armstrong (Chuck Jeffreys) decides to switch sides. Then a HK agent Dragon Lee (Robin Shou) and a Japanese assassin (Richard Yuen) get involved in this unholy mess. Which ends up in a massive fight in a warehouse.

These films seldom make sense but Honor & Glory takes this to a whole new level. It mostly consists of fairly random segments and plot lines that never get resolved. The film is fun, the fights are often good though lame attempts at plot get in the way a bit. A rare case of a film which needed more fighting and less storyline.

Curse of the Voodoo (1965)

Rather insipid voodoo nonsense. Smug big game hunter Mike (Bryant Haliday) kills a lion on safari, despite the advice of his fellow hunters including Lomas (Dennis Price). The lion was killed in the territory of a tribe who worship lions as gods and place a curse on those who kill them... Mike, who seems to only care about killing animals and boozing, scoffs at this curse of course.

He returns to London to his wife Janet (Lisa Daniely), he begins to have hallucinations. He imagines a lion attacking him in Regents Park. Later he also thinks he is being stalked by African voodoo warriors and ends up shooting up his hotel room...

It isn't too bad a film, at times quite suspenseful. The budget is limited though, the scenes in "Africa" look more like they are in Surrey. Quite what voodoo has to do with Africa and not Haiti of course is a big question which this film leaves unanswered. The main problem with this film is Mike, who is a rather unsympathetic character, you begin rooting for the "voodoo" warriors quite quickly.

The Scarlet Clue (1945)

A decent edition in the Charlie Chan series. Secret radar plans are under threat of being stolen by enemy agents, but when the suspect of Charlie Chan (Sidney Toler) is found dead evidence points to the radio station which shares buildings with the radar laboratory. Someone at the radio station is an agent and we soon find out that Ralph Brett (I. Stanford Jolly) is taking orders from his mysterious controller. Even Brett doesn't know who the controller is as they send their orders via teletype.

As the investigation continues so does the body count. The controller has a number of fiendish ways to kill including a killer elevator and microwave activated poison gas! Finally Chan, assisted by Number 3 Son (Benson Fong) and Birmingham Brown (Mantan Moreland), track down the controller. Though more by process of elimination more than anything else.

An interesting film with a fast moving plot and featuring a number of hi-tech (for the time) gimmicks. Not a bad film by any means, not the best Charlie Chan film but far from the worst either.

The Man Outside (1933)

A highly enjoyable country house whodunnit. A few years before some diamonds go missing after a robbery, then we switch to the home Captain Fordyce (Cyril Raymond) has recently - and unexpectedly - inherited from his uncle. His friend Harry (Henry Kendall) turns up to visit and finds out there have been some strange goings on lately. The maid Ann (Gillian Hind) says there is a mystery man hanging around...

Then the driver is found dead on the driveway. Inspector Jukes (John Turnbull) begins a slow and laboured investigation. Harry meanwhile finds out Fordyce's uncle was involved in crime, and diamonds from a robbery and hidden in the house. Harry finds the diamonds and then the lights go out...

A simple but superb film. The cast consists of the usual stereotypes of this genre including Auntie Georgina (Ethel Warwick) who plays a wonderfully snooty old dame. The identity of the murderer is an enjoyable twist.

The Curse of Bigfoot (1975)

An incredibly shoddy film, which takes a rough 1958 student horror film (Teenagers Battle the Thing) and pads it out with more modern footage which is even rougher! A bunch of bored American schoolkids are being told about monsters. The teacher has pretty much lost them so he calls upon his secret weapon... a rather stiff and inarticulate guest lecturer to tell them about Bigfoot!

This sets up the original film which involves a bunch of dorky kids and their teacher (Bill Simonson) desecrating Indian burial grounds. They find a strange mummy and take it back to their chalet. The mummy then comes to life and begins to menace the community... or one house anyway.

The film is incredibly slow and stretches things out with endless footage of logging and people looking at trees. The monster is horribly cheesy of course in the great tradition of men in rubber suits. Approached with the right frame of mind the film is campy and cheesy fun. Quite what an Indian mummy has to do with Bigfoot is of course the film's biggest mystery.

The Wraith (1986)

Rather odd 1980s car and rock nonsense. A gang of petrolheads led by Packard (Nick Casavettes) - truthfully other than Packard himself his gang is more a bunch of misfits - are terrorising the youth of an Arizona town. Then a mysterious stranger arrives, driving a hot black car and dressing like he escaped from a low-budget sci-fi terror. He takes the gang out one by one... usually in massive explosions which he somehow seems to return unscathed from.

There is another stranger in town too, Jake (Charlie Sheen). Packard's reluctant girl Keri (Sherilyn Fenn) is hot on Jake, much to Packard's disgust. But as his gang are wiped out one by one Packard has more on his mind... but is Jake the driver of the black car?

The film doesn't make much sense, plus the fact the mysterious killer car is indestructible takes a lot of the film's tension away. It is good mindless fun though, hot cars and girls with a mid-1980s rock soundtrack. 

Robin Hood (1922)

An epic silent movie, and indeed one of the most expensive ones to ever be made. Douglas Fairbanks is the Earl of Huntingdon who deserts from King Richard (Wallace Beery)'s forces away in the crusades after he hears of the cruel deeds being done by Prince John (Sam De Gasse) back home. The Earl is accused of being a traitor by the King and thus when the Earl returns to England he becomes the outlaw Robin Hood.

Robin Hood forms his merry band and challenges the evil Prince John and his henchman the Sherrif of Nottingham (William Lowery). Finally Robin Hood has to face his bitter rival and enemy Sir Guy (Paul Dickery) and rescue his love, the fair Maid Marian (Enid Bennett). All with the usual Fairbanks athleticism and daring-do of course!

The expense is obvious when you see this film, an large castle and village set were built. Set piece scenes with many extras are spectacular. The film is slightly too long though, while there is plenty of swashbuckling maybe at times the whole show needed a bit of editing. One interesting aspect of the film is that it concentrates heavily on how the Earl became Robin Hood, more than other movie Robin Hood films tend to do. The sets may have been big but Fairbanks was bigger, an astounding film in many ways.

Shock (1946)

A neat and dark little psychological thriller. Janet (Anabel Shaw) arrives at a hotel to be reunited with her husband Paul (Frank Latimore) who has just been released from a PoW camp. While she waits she witnesses a murder and is hurled into a paralytic shock. Luckily noted psychiatrist Dr Cross (Vincent Price) is on hand and offers to take her to his sanatorium. Of course the reason he was on-hand was because he has just murdered of his wife...

Dr Cross and his lover Elaine (Lynn Bari) conspire to have Janet declared insane to make sure the truth does not come out. However when the law is starting to sniff around the case of Dr Cross' dead wife the doctor is persuaded by Elaine to kill Janet to silence her forever...

We don't see how the doctor managed to get away with killing his wife in a full hotel and getting rid of her body unseen which maybe stretches credibility a bit. The sanatorium is creepy, the air of suspense lies heavy over everything. The darkest character is Elaine who is able to wrap Dr Cross around her little finger and manipulate him into committing all sorts of foul deeds.

Air Devils (1938)

A rather formulaic but decent action comedy. Two airmen (with nicknames natch) are in the employ of a South Seas territory constabulary, dropping bombs on restless natives and the like. Of course Horseshoe (Larry Blake) and Slats (Dick Purcell) are ex-marines buddies and now in an endless rivalry about pretty much everything... especially pretty girls like Marcia (Beryl Wallace).

While the authorities are trying to build an airbase the cafe owner Mordant (Charles Brokaw) is secretly planning a civil uprising, though for reasons of cash rather than anything noble. During the uprising Marcia is trapped and our two heroes manage to bumble their way into the fight...

So a plot not unlike a number of other films in the 1930s. The film is a bit of a meander at times, the comedy a bit overblown though the action scenes are reasonable, especially in the air. Politically, of course, it is of it's time.

Attack from Space (1965)

A hilarious compilation of two Japanese sci-fi TV serials. Starman (Ken Utsui) in his rather unflattering outfit is sent to Earth to warn them of the evil Sappharians and their plans to conquer Earth and/or the Universe. Meanwhile Dr Yamanaka (Hiroshi Hayashi) has built a spaceship but before he can use it he is captured (along with his children) by Sappharian agents.

The prisoners are taken to the Sappharian super secret base. Starman seems to end up in flames after being blown up by missiles, then various sites on Earth are blown up. Can Starman make a dramatic entrance to save the Earth?

As with all condensed versions of serials the storyline is rather confusing and disjointed with the frequent cliff hangers. The Sappharians, who are rather Nazi like even down to the salute, are rather useless. In one ridiculous scene a whole bunch of them are defeated by a teenage girl. 

Starman fights and defeats an entire army of the bad guys in what must be one of the longest single fight scenes in history. Campy nonsense for sure but a lot of fun.

The Mighty Peking Man (1977)

A superbly weird film just as you imagine the HK version of King Kong would be. Johnny Fang (Danny Lee) heads to the Himalayas to track down the mythical Peking Man or Utam, some sort of gigantic (although the size seems to vary between scenes) monstrous ape. Finally he discovers the creature but he is about to be crushed by it... until the arrival of a female Tarzan called Samantha (Evelyne Kraft) who was lost as a child in a plane crash in the Himalayas and bought up by Utam in the ..er.. jungles of the Himalayas.

Samantha falls for Johnny and he persuades her to bring Utam to HK so the whole world can see him. Utam ends up in a show but you just know it will end up badly...

An epic in monster mayhem, the destroyed buildings are so obviously models but the action scenes are tremendous set pieces. Samantha is a terrifically strange character, the fact she seems to hate wearing clothes adds to the sheer camp of much of the film. However amid the camp there is a lot of darkness in this film, Utam dies with honour, many of the humans die after being crushed by his giant feet. In fact Samantha (and maybe Johnny) apart, the humans in this film act terribly.