To Love Ferrari (1994)

The Ferrari in the title being a girl played by Vivian Chow not a car. Though she does get to drive one at the end of the film.

This is really half film half early 1990s cantopop music video, even down to a bizarre fight sequence where the heroes can only fight while listening to Grasshopper. And when the ghettoblaster is destroyed Vivian leaps onto some oil drums to hammer out the beat so they can fight on. No really.

Vivian plays a girl who dreams of being a singer, she is loved by two guys. They fight, balls get released onto the floor of a dancefloor and Vivian ends up going head first into some electric lights. She ends up blinded, her dreams of being a singer are shattered. Her brother's club gets involved with some minor hoodlums and Vivian is kidnapped. Of course she gets electrocuted again and cured. If only the world of real medicine was as miraculous as in the movies...

Nonsense of course but very watchable and typically cross genre like many HK films. If you like early 1990s cantopop then the soundtrack is great. The film is worth watching just for the tunes and the zaniness of HK pop culture back then.

Music Hall (1934)

Wonderful nostalgia. An old music hall managed by Bill (George Carney) has hit the skids and must close down. However in a last gasp to save the old place from being demolished and turned into shops and apartments the old founder of the hall Mr Davis (Wilson Coleman) returns to relaunch a refreshed music hall with new acts...

So basically the film has a bit of story just as a set-up before a list of acts. Including comedians, singers like G.H. Elliot, Dutchmen with accordions, footballers on bicycles, dancers (including the The Sherman Fisher Girls), performing animals and acrobats! If we are to be honest some of the acts were pretty ropey (bear in mind these were supposed to be fresher and better than the usual ones!)

You can't beat the nostalgia though. A glimpse of a now lost Britain from the interwar period, some things we now miss (xylophones) and others things we don't miss so much (blackface).

Sing and Swing (1963)

Before the Beatles... there indeed was a British pop music scene which was thriving though somewhat overshadowed these days. Young hopeful Dave (David Hemmings) wants to hit the big time with his band of young post boys. Despite a few near misses though including Dave having an accident in a studio and meeting Kenny Ball success eludes them especially when he loses the demo tape. His relationship with Jill (Jennifer Moss) also becomes a bit rocky at times...

Well the story is very familiar, the basic template used so many times in films like this. A bit of light drama interspersed by plenty of pop tunes. Guest appearances by real pop stars including Gene Vincent, Patsy Ann Noble and those who would one day become pretty famous indeed including Richie Blackmore and Chas Hodges. A fascinating if not explosive period piece. Swinging!

Cool as Ice (1991)

Its Vanilla Ice! Vanilla Ice and his friends wander around on their motorbikes and pumping out the occasional sick bit of hip hop. Vanilla meets Kathy (Kristin Minter) a girl he takes a shine too after he accidentally makes her fall off her horse. While Vanilla and her dorky boyfriend fight for Kathy's affections, her parents (who are apparently on witness protection) are tracked down by a couple of bozo corrupt ex-cops...

When Kathy's kid brother is kidnapped by the corrupt cops only Vanilla Ice can save the day (of course!)

It is a rather flimsy film, more like an extended pop video book ended by some badly acted segments and padded out by a number of montages. It is incredibly early 90s, it'll make you nostalgic if nothing else especially for the colour yellow.

To be honest despite the fact the film should be (and to honest actually is) utterly awful... it is still highly enjoyable due to the pure cheese and unintentional hilarity. Vanilla Ice has plenty of charisma onscreen but he does seem to spend most of the film in a mild state of confusion.

Bubbling Over (1934)

A cute little musical short film. Ethel (Ethel Waters) is a hard working housewife who toils away in her house full of loafers. But all that changes when they are told by a bogus Swami (Frank Wilson) that a rich relative will soon come and be willing to share his wealth, unfortunately it isn't quite true...

Well the story is pretty meaningless though some of the humour is pretty funny though dated. The film is a showcase for some nice music, especially from Ethel Waters and the Southernaires Quartet. Just enjoy it for what it is.

Harlem is Heaven (1932)

This film wanted to showcase fine early 1930s music and dance moves from Bill Robinson. They needed some kind of plot to hang the musical parts of the movie on, unfortunately the plot is rather flimsy.

Jean (Anise Boyer) is in town wanting a job, she meets up with Money Johnson (James Baskett) who offers her one, and he can as he is the rich man in town. Unfortunately those riches are from the proceeds of crime...

Johnson says he is nice to people who are loyal and Jean is loyal for now. She gets drawn into Johnson's criminal doings but soon wants out, but doing so ain't easy... maybe Bill Robinson can help her out.

Well that is more or less what it is about, the story isn't really all that. Some of the acting is fun though. As a "black" film in the 1930s the black actors get to act in normal roles and not the usual ridiculous stereotypes in contemporary Hollywood fare. The best bit is the dancing and music though, its worth watching just for that.

Remember Me This Way (1974)

A Gary Glitter documentary, but long before any of that came to light. This was made in the early 1970s when he was at the height of his stardom and playing to audiences full of screaming girls...

The documentary, which is more a series of random and sometimes boring vignettes interspersed with Glitter singing, follows preparations for a big show. Footage of which ends the film. It also shows the recording of I love you love me love and even the seven inch singles being pressed, while his management team discuss how they are going to make money out of his records in a rather tedious segment.

Away from the concert and record making we see Glitter chilling out, at parties and doing some promotional work. In some ways its a fascinating look at early 70s pop music but it is a genuinely terrible film (and not because of hindsight) it was just so badly made. Despite all that this was a box office hit which just shows how big a star he was back then!

The Phantom Broadcast (1933)

Arnold Gray is Grant Murdoch, a singer on the radio who has every woman swooning at his feet and arrogance to match his libido. What people don't know is that he isn't really a singer, his accompanist and manager Norman Wilder (Ralph Forbes) is actually the singer but due to being a hunchback lets Murdoch mime and get all the glory.

Not that the star is very grateful, he treats Wilder badly and hangs out with a mobster's moll (Vivienne Osborne) though also treats her like dirt. The mob in fact want to get rid of Wilder and get Murdoch for themselves but Wilder manages to avoid a hail of bullets.

Wilder falls in love with aspiring singer Laura (Gail Patrick). When Murdoch muscles in on her it sends the fractious working relationship into meltdown. Wilder finds Murdoch murdered and thinking Laura did it he takes the blame...

A cheap and sometimes confusing but undeniably enjoyable film with a great deal of crooning. The early days of radio are fascinating with announcers in their dinner jackets. If you like Art Deco then the sets in this film will be a fantasy for you.

Postal Inspector (1936)

A light hearted musical crime film where Ricardo Cortez plays Bill Davis, who has made the rather dull bureaucratic job of being a post inspector into some kind of butch all-American hero. Bill crosses paths with singer Connie (Patricia Ellis) who sings in a club owned by the short of cash Benez (Bela Lugosi).

She lets slip that there is a shipment of $3 million worth of retired bank notes set to be sent back to Washington. Benez schemes to steal the cash during a flood disaster which engulfs the city...

It is a confusing film, it seems a bit unsure at times what kind of film it is. is it a crime film, a comedy, a disaster film, a musical? It is obviously sponsored by the US Postal Service and the propaganda is laid on a little thick. The flood scenes are well done and Connie's singing is pretty decent too. It ends with a pretty exciting speedboat chase! Despite it's shortcomings this is an enjoyable film.

Top of the Bill (1971)

Before the TV and movie star, even before the radio and record star was the music hall star. This charming (and frequently rather odd) documentary celebrates the days of music hall, variety and vaudeville which even in 1971 was passing into fading memory (some of the members of the public with memories of music hall were in their eighties).

There is sadness as Ben Warriss and Ken Goodwin give us a tour of former music hall venues which are now bingo halls, shopping centres or even just piles of rubble. Also quite sad is when Ben interviews young passers by and they don't know who he is!

The memories are interspersed by example music hall acts by the likes of Sally Barnes, Charlie Chester performs as Max Miller and Ken Goodwin who does a George Formby impression. Not only has music hall now gone, but the London in this film is largely unrecognisable. Well it was indeed a lost world and it was wonderful.

Stars On Parade (1936)

Stars On Parade collects a variety of music hall acts (comedians, singers, dancers et cetera) and what a nostalgia fest it is.

It doesn't all work, some of the comedy sketches are a little drawn out but the next act is usually up pretty quickly anyway. The best acts were the singer Navarre, the magician Horace Goldin, the detective dog Dr Watson, a high energy dance number by the Sherman Fisher Girls and a lovely accordion-backed song by Pat Hyde.

The acts hang on a vague storyline about an investigation into a poisoning but don't take much notice of that! It is very entertaining (at times), quite corny at others and sometimes simply odd (a horse painted white posed as a statue, whats that all about?) A world that's now long gone and that's a shame.